Which flag

[Drac]

Good day all,

I'm checking on a the various forums I participate on. There also seems to be a large number of military people here.

I've been running a project for many years where I have a flag that had flown over the ship I was on during Desert Storm. Since then it has been flying over various historic ships, sites and monuments. Over 40 to date with some being really special.

I had always planned to use this flag when I retire for my box.

Now comes the problem. My Grandfather's body had passed on recently (he had alztimers so he had died many years before that) and he had a military funeral as a WWII Navy Vet. My mother wishes to give the flag to me since I am the only living person in the family with military let alone Navy. I will be getting it when I go home for a visit in a couple weeks. I was unable to attend the funeral.

Now I am torn between which flag to use. I have a little time (3 years) before the day.

Seeing if any of you have been in a similar position? I also have his Dress Blue jumper as well as his original ribbons.

Thanks for your help,
Jim

[Lyle1]

The flags that are used on coffins are not the same as the flag that was flown on a ship The proportions on a flag made to use on a coffin are quite different. A flag for a coffin is narrower and longer than a normal flag; flags for coffins are cut long enough to cover the length of a coffin, and only wide enough to cover the coffin from side to side. If the normal length to width proportions were used, a flag long enough to cover the length of the coffin would drag on the ground at the sides of the coffin.

[Chas]

If it were me I would use your flag - for the simple reason that it is your flag. It is imbued with your experiences and should, quite rightly, follow your career.

Your mother has put you, unfairly, in an impossible position and given you a guilt trip. Not wishing to be morbid, but if you feel strongly enough, you could always stipulate the use of your grandfather's flag for your own funeral. It would then create a family history and heirloom. Rather like some families have a christening robe, yours could have a funeral flag.

Civilians can also be patriots. There is the famous quote, "They also serve, who only stand and wait." In the UK, many non-military people are buried under a Union Flag. Is that not possible in the US?

Regards

Chas

[piperdbh]

In the UK, many non-military people are buried under a Union Flag. Is that not possible in the US?

I've never seen or heard of it being done, and I've been to a lot of funerals.

Drac,
If it were me, I'd use my own flag, and keep your grandfather's sealed up in its own box, one reason being that his flag is older than yours and possibly more fragile. It would really be a fine display to have both of them beside each other in their boxes with each of your medals and decorations in matching shadow boxes.

[Highlander31]

Use your own flag. Its history is part of you.

[Coastie]

I would use your flag as well. I used a flag flown from my last ship, in my case as the ship crossed the Arctic circle at the date line. It is a good conversation point when folks ask about the box. I just think your flag is too personal to you to pass up using it.

Now since you have some of your grandfather's awards you could have a shadow box for his service if you wanted to.

[Thor271]

I would use your flag as well. I used a flag flown from my last ship, in my case as the ship crossed the Arctic circle at the date line. It is a good conversation point when folks ask about the box. I just think your flag is too personal to you to pass up using it.

Now since you have some of your grandfather's awards you could have a shadow box for his service if you wanted to.

I agree with Coastie. I'm in a situation like yours, my Grandfather and I share the same Trade in the EME (Electrical Mechanical Engineers) Branch. We have served on many of the same bases and units, he served in WW2 and Korea, I served in Afghanistan. I have all of his RCEME (Royal Canadian Electrical Mechanical Engineers) Accoutrements, his Flag and Ribbons, as well as my own. My entire Family is or was in the service, so all of his things came to me as I was the only one to serve in the same Trade, Branch, Element (Army).

I've decided that once I retire I will have my Shadow Box made up from my own and place it beside his. Also when my Father passes I will take all of his "Jimmy Wear" and put it in a shadow box to have all three generations side by each.

I'd throw up a picture but all my things have been packed up in preparation of my moving to my new post.

Good Luck!

[Mickey]

Drac,
If it were me, I'd use my own flag, and keep your grandfather's sealed up in its own box, one reason being that his flag is older than yours and possibly more fragile. It would really be a fine display to have both of them beside each other in their boxes with each of your medals and decorations in matching shadow boxes.

My thoughts exactly.

[Spartan Tartan]

I would keep your flag for your shadow box. I would also make a shadow box or some display for your grandpa using his flag.

I have my grandpa's flag sitting about 2 feet behind me in my office at this very moment. It is the first and most prominently displayed item in every office I have ever had and will continue to be so in the future. I still have the shells folded into the flag from the 21 gun salute at the funeral for my grandpa. The flag sits in a box alone with an inscription dedicated to my granpa.

[Detroitpete]

Drac,

I'm a veteran and so was my grandfather. I had the honor of serving in his honor guard at his memorial service. My mother received his burial flag, then later gave it to me. I used it in the memorial box I created for him. I, too have my own flag that will hopefully be used to cover me at my memorial service.

I say, recieve his gift in the manner and honor which it is given and use it to remember him and his service. Use your's for your own purposes.