The Gopher and the Scotsman

[Southern Breeze]

I was watching Caddy Shack several weeks ago and was inspired to write this. Good or bad, I've decided to post it.


The Gopher and the Scotsman

Hi....remember me? Your favorite furry critter from Caddy Shack! Yes, it’s me Mr. Gopher. Now, normally I don’t tell stories, but this one is too good not to tell. Since those two ladies involved are too shy to tell you about it, I guess I’m going to have to.

I moved from that awful golf course, with the psychotic groundskeeper who repeatedly tried to kill me, to the beautiful highlands of Scotland about 2 years ago. The park I live in is quiet; there's almost no humans running around. Now when I first arrived I was rather shocked to see men wearing skirts! I soon made friends with the Haggis who lived down the street and learned that the skirts were actually called kilts. He also told me they were the national dress of Scotland and a bit of the history. I was sure glad that groundskeeper wasn't one of the Ladies From Hell, otherwise I wouldn't be around to tell this.
I was minding my own business one evening, waiting for my dear Ms. Gopher to get home, when I heard all this giggling up top. Being as nosey as us gophers are, I had to check it out. When I peeked out, I saw those two ladies checking out a kilted guy who had obviosly had a bit too much to drink. Well, I decided to see what would happen next and boy, was I surprised! Not only did they give him a kilt check, they tied a ribbon around..... well you've heard the song. Trust me, It's accurate. They then left, so I went on did some yard work.

I'd almost forgotten the incident when I heard I heard someone say.
"I don't where you've been lad, but I see you've won first prize!"

Gotta run, I've got to get the yardwork done before my wife gets done.
Cheers, Mr Gopher

[Macman]

Good stuff, SB! Caddyshack is one of my all-time favourite movies. It's good to hear "The Varmint Cong" is alive and doing well in Scotland!