Another English Bloke

[English Bloke]

Hi. My name's John and I'm an English Bloke. I see what you're thinkin'; I'm in the wrong forum. I should be skipping along to morris-dancers.co.uk or 50ways-toroast-yourbeef.com I'd better quantify my Englishness. I am in fact, devoutly English. My Father was English and my Mother was English too; or at least she sounded like it all her life. My only connection to things Scotia was a slightly over-enthusiastic appreciation of the ‘water of life’; the good stuff mind, not the blended rubbish. I’ve always been aware that there is a link to the proud sons of Angus in my family, my Grandmother (maternal) was Anglo-Scot down the Bruce Line and my Grandfather (also maternal) was Anglo-Scot down the Grant Line so I suppose that makes my mum half Scots technically and by a process of watering makes me quarter Scots. I have to admit I've always seen myself as English though, I've always thought English and talked English as well as supporting England in all sports (and still do). I have no intention of changing that either. Better get to the point of all this then eh?

I currently work in Scotland and suffer much anti-English banter which I find fun to be honest. I could go down the “I’m a victim of Racism” route but a pouting bottom lip never did suit me. I am referred to as the “Guffie Ba****d” on a daily basis; Guffie being a Glaswegian term for a person from the southern Scottish county of Englandshire. These Caledonians still recall with relish the Scottish Stewarts. That dynasty of Monarchs who ruled England, as well as Scotland by English request starting with James the 6th and 1st. I choose to give as good as I get on the banter front and it makes my working days entertaining to say the least. With regard to the Kilt, I've always been puzzled why any fellow would want to wear a dress, particularly in public and have often commented on this. A typical English attitude if ever there was one. In order to collect some retaliatory ammunition I began to research the Kilt, it's history and origins and was quite surprised at what I found. Apart from the fact that the Clan / Tartan association is a load of Victorian twaddle dreamed up by a couple of Polish fraudsters on the make (Sobieski-Stuarts and their Vestiarium Scoticum). Imagine my delight at the discovery that the small kilt (Philbeag beg) was actually invented by the Englishman and Lancastrian industrialist, Thomas Rawlinson around 1725 as a practical adaptation of the Great Kilt (Feileadh Bhreacain). The present day Kilt doesn’t just come from my country but comes from my county! I’ve rattled a few Celtic cages with this revelation I can tell you.

Anywhoo. The resulting response to my Scottish colleagues indignation and disbelief at my findings was that I bought one (a kilt that is). It’s an English garment after all so I should embrace it. The one I bought is not really a real kilt. Not in the £300+ 8 Yard, 16oz Heavyweight, pure wool sense, but it’s an 8 yard, 16oz Poly-viscose casual (and more importantly, machine washable) footy Kilt. Looks the part but won’t leave my bank balance hanging in the wardrobe when the novelty wears off. It’s just a passing fad; or so I thought.

I chose a plain black one which I dubbed the McGuffie Tartan amongst my Jockanese mates. Some thought this highly amusing, an Englishman in a kilt indeed! Others really took umbridge and saw me as stealing away Scottish culture (on that point I take you back to my family background at the beginning of this post, though some do say quarter-Scottish is a little tenuous). I could have ordered a colourful one but I am aware that a lot of Scots ARE sensitive to the Tartan / Clan thing and I didn’t really want to upset anyone with my insensitivity. I also ordered a day sporran of black leather (with tassels), brogues (black), black leather kilt-belt (and buckle), Kilt socks (hose - black), flashes (black), flouncy black Jackobite shirt (though I’m not keen on it, bit too flouncy for my liking), Kilt pin, Glengarry hat (plain, not diced) and badge, incidentally this is probably the coolest hat I’ve ever owned. I topped it all off with the addition of a black feather hackle. Later, after some consideration, I imagined I’d look more like a funeral horse than a kilted warrior so as an after thought I also ordered red flashes and a red hackle to go with the red torrie on top of mee ‘at (makes all the difference giving just a hint of contrast). I also noted that the whole shebang doesn’t come with underpants but hey, ‘cest la vie.

When my ‘outfit’ turned up in the mail I was still… err… abroad as it were so I had to wait till I got home to Englandshire before I could try it on. I was fairly amused at first as I unpacked the box but after pulling on the kilt and applying the accoutrements with care, there was a feeling of back-straightening and standing just a bit taller. I checked the brogues to make sure they didn’t have enormous platform soles; and no? I really did feel the business! I was immediately taken by the sensation of… well freedom, in more senses than one. Over the next few days I wore it out a couple of times to practice (Not the full regalia, just the Kilt, sporran and hose trimmed with a rugby shirt and chunky Boots) and although I was not aware of the turning heads around me (Kilts in England are fairly unusual, “You’re in Lancashire Lad, not bloody Lanarkshire!”) my beautiful wife told me that everyone was staring (although not in a bad way) once my back was turned.

I was unflustered, In fact I loved it so much that subsequently I bought another one. This time in Black Watch Tartan. As you know, Black Watch is a universal tartan and as I did a lot of years in the service of Her Majesty (Gawd blesser), often alongside Scottish Regiments, I felt I could… I actually like this one better than the black one and wear it as first choice. I’ve also now got an Argyll Jacket for the more formal occasions and a black fur, dress sporran with silvered cantle (It’s actually quite cheap and nasty but looks OK from the window of a passing bus), I’ve also added a Bruce pin and cap badge, several pairs of hose (don’t want to be wearing the same pair of socks two days on the bounce) and a nifty little sgian dhu. Where I work it’s not really appropriate to wear the Kilt in the workplace. This is due to the nature of the work rather than the location of the job so I save it for when I’m home but I’ve usually got one of my kilts on at least two or three times a week. I find it goes particularly well in a drinking environ (hic!). It’s my intention to invest in a proper heavyweight, 8 yard Kilt in Bruce Modern at some point although I’m happy with what I have for the time being. See? I’m drawn into this Tartan fiction as well, it’s how traditions begin and my Black Watch counts as Grant Hunting already. When my two footy kilts are past it, I’ll make the next move.

I stumbled across this forum by accident while doing kilt related searches (I’m a bit obsessed to be honest and I’m now studying the history of military tartan and Scottish orientated Regiments around the world) and have really enjoyed reading the threads on here. It seems there are many kilted chaps who have the same passion I have discovered. Not sure where I stand with regard to Utili-kilts as I’ve never seen one in Britain but then again 6 months ago you would have had to kill me to get me in a traditional kilt.

Probably too much here for a first posting so I’ll quit before I bore you all to sleep with another digression. Take care kilted ones, it’s nice to meet you all. It IS the business though isn’t it?

[McMurdo]

English Bloke From Toronto Canada, as you are looking into the History of the kilt and you have brought up Thomas Rawlinson I urge you to do a bit more research as the Rawlinson story while a good yarn is tenuous at best. I direct you to the following take from it what you will.

http://albanach.org/kilt.html

[Splash_4]

What a great introduction of yourself to the forum. Looking forward to getting to know you better through other posts.

[highlander_Daz]

without getting political its nice to meet someone proud of their heritage, Im dissoponted for you that you get abuse from the weegies, however I hope its in Jest, in most parts of Scotland you will not experience abuse. ask your Weegie mates to bear in mind that Scottish blood is like whisky in that no matter how much you add water to it its still the dominant taste !

as for the Kilt being unusual in Lancashire, every weekend you find people donning it and getting spliced, and there is a triving pipe band scene

http://www.eyrewaves.co.uk/

and the Lancashire federeration of Scottish Societys

http://www.scotsoc.org.uk/

[Arlen]

Hello and welcome from a Glaswegian!
As far as I'm concerned as long as you have a bit of respect for it then anyone can wear a Kilt.
However, as pointed out, the old yarn about the Kilt actually being English (Or Irish, or from wherever else one of those myths has sprung up) is actually just that, an old yarn.

I'm sure you wear the Kilt wonderfully well and you are more than welcome here.

[Coinneach]

from both southern US coasts!

Don't worry. It's OK to be English. We have at least one other kilt-wearing fellow from that fine country here some place...what was his name now...hmm...begins with an H I think. It'll come to me...oh I'll let him introduce himself in his own good time.

Again, welcome!

[KiltedSkeleton]

Welcome from Sherwood, OR. Remeber the first step to addiction is admiting your addicted...or some thing like that. Your definetly in the right place though.

[pdcorlis]

Hi Dee Ho from I Dee Ho - Welcome to the rabble!

[Finn]

Welcome from West Virginia!
I haven't a drop of Scots blood, but love kilts and Celtic cultural interpretations.
I believe there are two other Englishmen on board and a Welshman (who are active). I expect there are likely more.

[jordanjm]

from Salt Lake City, Utah