first negative encounter

[mcpelle]

Last week the wife and I decided to go for a spin, which we do regularly on Sundays, as we are fervent Legion Members, we do visit different Legions as a hobby and collect Legion ribbons. We stopped in Elora ON for a visit with McHummel(very nice visit- see a picture of me and McHummel in his picture album- I am the nice looking one . However from there we went to the Durham Legion and were very welcome, no comments about me wearing a kilt, then to Mt-Forest Legion and again nobody seem to care what I was wearing, and then to Arthur Legion, walked in and were very welcomed, sat by ourselves and watched the masters on TV. Later on the bartender suggested we joined an occupied table, which we did and enjoyed.(the President was also sitting at that table) Then walked in this man and his buddy, coming to me and suggested I should be upstairs with the women as he said I was wearing a skirt! - to which I replied to him - "I have what you do not have - the guts to do it" it shut him up. In all times I have worn a kilt in public this was the only stupid coming from an obvioully not confident with his own sexuality.(he also was wearing silky pants?)

[NewKilt]

It happens to all of us from time to time. Obviously you stopped him right in his tracks, and at the same time kept your cool. Well done.

Darrell

[Alan H]

The world is not FULL of "them"...but occasionally those folks do pass on their genes, so you bump into them now and then. PWe can both say "nntwit"...

...and go back to drinking our beer with folks at your table.

[James]

I think a very pertinent point was touched upon-the chaps own confidence in his sexuality.

I have noticed over many years of kilt wearing that those who feel most threatened are the chaps who have issues latent or otherwise with their own sexuality: and so are the ones most likely to react in an apparently offensive, but really defensive manner. They are trying to demonstrate their own possibly spurious manhood.

Another example of this being the chaps who get very concerned about their kilt being called a skirt [ignore here the defence of this board], the man sure of his sexuality just thinks it a joke. However the one not so sure of his masculinity, will tend to go very much on the defensive and insist that what he is wearing is not a skirt, but a kilt.

However there is one other area, and that is the chap who is trying to make a light joke with no ill-will: but is clumsy with words, and so without intending to do so, is in fact offensive.

In all cases the best response is not to worry, and pass it all off with a joke. remembering too that we are a minority, so will attract jokes-good jokes, bad jokes-it comes with the territory.

To end on a light note-many years ago a very highland piper was trying to teach us a reel-and to get the men and women into position said 'The ones in the long skirts to the left and in short skirts to the right'. That was on a serious clan occasion, with both our chief to be and his sister in the party-and everyone thought it funny.

James

[Robin]

"C'est le ton qui fait la musique"

When someone makes a skirt remark with a friendly face or a "pulling your leg" smile all is fine.
When someone makes a skirt remark, because he/she never seen or even heard of a kilt...fine also. We can't blame people for not knowing anything about kilts.

When the skirt remark is clearly ment to insult...reply...ignore...whatever.
He or she...mostly a he...is an idiot with bad manners.

Kilts ARE skirts...both traditional and contemporary.

My own mum...always calls them skirts or scottish skirts, she knows they're kilts and she knows they're menswear...and she likes them very much. I don't even bother to correct her.

My boss (almost ex-boss) is a paranoid, frustrated, homophobic, xenophobic, insecure and pathetic sad man...his head almost exploded when I started wearing kilts...Good to him

[Rusty]

Robin, you and I must have the same boss Poor pathetic twit......

My boss was giving me guff about the kilt recently when I suggested he would look dapper in a kilt. I suggested that he could wear the US Navy Tartan as he is ex navy. I don't want to repeat what he said except that he suggested that all Navy men that wear kilts were fags. (his words gentlemen as I don't want to inflame anyone) You might find this offensive. However, I have to work with this idiot.

[Hamish]

.................................................. ................To end on a light note-many years ago a very highland piper was trying to teach us a reel-and to get the men and women into position said 'The ones in the long skirts to the left and in short skirts to the right'. That was on a serious clan occasion, with both our chief to be and his sister in the party-and everyone thought it funny.

James

Many years ago, I attended a specialised Scottish Country Dance/Highland Dance weekend and I clearly remember one of the course instructors using very similar, if not identical, words. I'd quite forgotten that until I read your tale.

Thank you, James, for a well-worded and pertinent posting.

I am a Gay man who, incidentally, cannot cope with men-in-drag acts, but I have no problems with anyone referring to my kilts as skirts as long as it is done in good humour. Touch wood, it has been years since the word has been directed at me in a derogatory tone!

[GatorUK]

Then walked in this man and his buddy, coming to me and suggested I should be upstairs with the women as he said I was wearing a skirt! - to which I replied to him - "I have what you do not have - the guts to do it" it shut him up. In all times I have worn a kilt in public this was the only stupid coming from an obvioully not confident with his own sexuality.(he also was wearing silky pants?)

As a proper, polite, and distinguished US Naval veteran I would have stood in greeting and my response would have been the standard "It is a kilt and I was just upstairs with your woman. By the way, she says she will be right down when she finds her skirt and can walk again."