Never question a drunk.....

[James MacMillan]

WHY YOU NEVER QUESTION A DRUNK

I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk

A carton of eggs

A quart of orange juice

A head of lettuce

A 2 lb. can of coffee

A 1 lb. package of bacon

As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind me watched as I placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." I was a bit startled by this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since I was indeed single. I looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about my selections that could have tipped off the drunk to my marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: "Well, you know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?"




The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

[ccga3359]

Bada ting. Fortunately looks aren't hereditary, are they Dad!

[James MacMillan]

Bada ting. Fortunately looks aren't hereditary, are they Dad!

No - But baldness is................

[ccga3359]

No - But baldness is................

[McFarkus]

No - But baldness is................

I've always heard that baldness (or lack thereof) is inherited from the maternal grandfather.

[CactusJack]

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

James, I'm sorry I didn't know that was you or I would never had said that.

[Bugbear]

Ha ha ha ha! That's why I don't drink.

[TheKiltedWonder]

that IS why I drink

haha, seriously though, it was clearly the bacon and eggs. No way you could be married and not have been so nagged about cholesterol levels that you'd be able to buy both at once

[Bugbear]

Well, sometimes drunks can't help but tell the raw truth. And they do say booze makes everyone look better... Just joking, just joking.

[beloitpiper]

HAHAHA!

Sorry for laughing, but you gotta admit, that's pretty hilarious.