Venting.

[Mr. Woolery]

I am in San Diego for a few more days (total of a week and a half) because of a relative's medical emergency. Coming from Fairbanks (50 degrees and raining) to California (90 in the daytime, muggy) made me rather miserable. As you can imagine.

Anyway, I did bring a kilt (twill casual) and wore it as soon as I felt how miserable life is in San Diego in jeans. I've had no negative comments except from my uncle. Every single day I visited him in the hospital and every single day he felt like he had to comment to me and again to anyone else in earshot (nurses, cleaning staff, other patients, their families, the food service folks) that it is the right garment for Hillcrest. See, the neighborhood of Hillcrest is apparently known locally as a "gay" community. So, essentially, he is telling me and everyone who sees me that I look gay.

Now, I'm not going to say a word against lifestyles that involve same-sex partners. Several friends, including two kilt wearers, are not interested in ladies. But I'm as straight as John Wayne sitting on a horse and voting for Ronald Reagan. Once or twice would not be so bad. But every single time I put the silly thing on.

So, yesterday he says to me "I really wish you wouldn't wear that kilt." Since I am here to help with his recovery and recuperation, I figure I'll deal with the discomfort. I wore jeans today. Misery! Hot, sticky, sweaty, icky misery! I got introduced to the next-door neighbors and he spent about half an hour telling them that although he trusts that I am straight, I do sometimes wear a kilt and that's really weird. I finally stuck up for myself a bit and now HE is acting offended.

I just needed to vent. But I'm putting my kilt back on tomorrow. One day like this was bad enough.

The up side was I got by a Joann fabrics and got some poly/rayon tartan material so I can make kilts in Black Stewart and Black Watch. Or at least in plaids so close to those tartans that I can't tell a difference. There was also some Dress MacDonald, but the red threads were metalic instead of just plain red. Too odd. So, there's a plus to being down here.

-Patrick

[Doomsday]

Well, what can ya do? Just continue to love your uncle and let it go. Though if you feel comfortable enough to confront him you might say that "It does not matter what he says about it you are going to where the kilt and you would appreciate it if he would stop making a fuss about it." however, be as kind as possible, you don't want to ruin your relationship over differing ideas about the kilt. It's just not worth it. I do feel for you though, I've had a similar experience to yours.

The up side was I got by a Joann fabrics and got some poly/rayon tartan material so I can make kilts in Black Stewart and Black Watch. Or at least in plaids so close to those tartans that I can't tell a difference. There was also some Dress MacDonald, but the red threads were metalic instead of just plain red. Too odd. So, there's a plus to being down here.

I also just bought some fashion tartan from Joann's as well. the woman at the cutting desk told me that Joann's has a new CEO and it looks as though they may start carrying more of the tartan fabrics.

[Larry124]

Lots of "shouldn't go there" aspects methinks.

[meinfs]

Sorry to hear that your uncle does not approve. Hang in there! I hope he recuperates fast so you can wear your kilt without worrying about making him feel distressed. I don't understand his "he trusts that you are straight" comment - because it is, to me, irrelevant and a non-issue. Anyway, he needs to see more kilts worn. Good for you to come down to help family!

[Panache]

Patrick,

If you made the long journey from Alaska to our Golden State for the sole purpose of comforting your ill uncle in the hospital, then it seems that going the extra mile and wearing clothing that makes him comfortable is a small sacrifice. Family is family, and a kilt is a bit of cloth. You can change into it after your visits. My good wishes for your uncle's health and recovery.

I would remind everyone that the kilt is a masculine garment, and masculinity is not linked to one's sexual preferences.

Respecfully

Jamie

[Doomsday]

Patrick,
If you made the long journey from Alaska to our Golden State for the sole purpose of comforting your ill uncle in the hospital, then it seems that going the extra mile and wearing clothing that makes him comfortable is a small sacrifice. Family is family, and a kilt is a bit of cloth. You can change into it after your visits.

Very, very, true. Please don't hurt your relationship with your uncle over something as minor as a kilt. I want to stress, that when I mentioned confronting him, I meant it in the kindest possible manner. You obviously care deeply for your uncle and it sounds like he cares about you as well. You know your situation better than any of us, so please take any advise I give with a bit of salt. If you don't care for advise just let us know, and I am sure we will all let you vent. But, know that we hear you and that we do care. Good on ya for taking your time and spending it with your uncle.
Cheers, Geoffrey

[Coinneach]

You're absolutely right, though, if you're anywhere 5 to 10 miles inland in San Diego this week, the kilt is the right garment to wear. Good for you on trying it his way and wearing jeans; too bad he didn't let it rest.

Perhaps your uncle is so uncomfortable being in the hospital he's just focusing on something else to take his mind off it. That doesn't make it any more pleasant for you.

I live inland and I spent all day yesterday kilted...and will do so again today.

Hope your uncle continues to mend.

[sydnie7]

Patrick -- we've recently moved to SD, near the beach. For weather's sake, be glad your uncle isn't recuperating in the LA/San Fernando Valley area!

If you're living out of a hotel room and restaurant meals, Bob and I would be pleased to offer you a relaxed evening and home-cooked dinner before you leave. Just PM and we'll set it up.

Sydnie

[CelticRanger66]

Just blow it off Panache is right your loved one is just trying to focus on something other than being in a hospital. But you know when someone asks me if I am gay I say yeap I am very happy in a kilt!!!

Hope all is well with uncle and for a speedy recorvery!!

[gu3]

It seems to me your uncle might endure his recuperation better if he were to watch a DVD or two.