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11th July 09, 12:54 AM
#1
What makes the perfect sporran?
We've had discussions like this before, but maybe it's time to consider it again.
What makes the perfect sporran? Does the perfect sporran exist? These are two questions, which have been occupying my mind for a few weeks.
Let's start with the attributes that I consider make a perfect sporran.
1. Large enough to hold everything that I normally carry.
2. Carry everything that I normally carry securely.
3. Allow easy, rapid access to all items. For me, this means compartments.
4. Constructed of good quality material, in my mind this means good quality leather.
5. Allow one-handed extraction of all contents.
6. Be appropriate for the activity.
Let's back up and think about why I consider the kilt and sporran superior to pants and pockets. A typical pair of pants has two back pockets, and two front pockets, sometimes a watch pocket. In these pockets the average western male carries:
Rear pocket #1 - Wallet
Rear pocket #2 - Handkerchief and comb
Front pocket #1 - Paper money
Front pocket #2 - Pocketknife, keys and coins
Watch pocket - Watch
Some extra items that might also be carried include: ball point pen, cell phone, lighter, gun, coin purse, paperback book, notebook, flask and camera. Some people carry their cell phones and keys on the belt, and ball point pen in shirt pocket.
When you wore pants, you probably did something like the following: If you are right handed, you probably carried your wallet in the right rear pocket, and the handkerchief and comb in the left rear pocket. Pocketknife and coins might go in the right front pocket and paper money and keys in the left front pocket.
Let's say you have a large, heavy object in your right hand and you need a quarter for the meter from your right front pants pocket. Can you reach it with your left hand? - No. With a sporran, you can probably open and retrieve every item with one hand (closing the sporran might require two hands, but I'll go into that later.)
So I consider the kilt and sporran to be superior to pants and pockets!
Over the years, I have amassed quite a few sporrans. I have fancy fur dress sporrans, leather semi-dress sporrans, and leather and cloth casual sporrans. I also still have several really cheapo cardboard quality leather sporrans that I loan out (I don't use them!)
The dress sporrans generally have smaller pouches and don't hold much, but the pockets in your jacket or coat offset this.
Some dress sporrans  
The semi-dress sporrans, which I wear with a coat and tie or jacket are good quality leather, have inside pockets and are large enough to hold everything, plus.
Some semi-dress sporrans  
The casual sporrans are also large enough to hold everything and have inside pockets or compartments.
Some casual sporrans   
Like the wives, I pick the appropriate sporran for the style of dress, color and/or activity.
Not one of my sporrans has all the qualities that I would like. Some come very close.
The Stillwater night stalker (either nylon or leather) comes the closest, but I don't really consider them very dressy. They can be opened and closed with one hand. All contents can be reached with one hand. It has enough compartments for all my stuff.
My Semi-dress sporrans are great, good quality leather, inside pockets or dividers but some require two hands to open, and all require two hands to close. The dress sporrans are just for dress.
Does the perfect sporran exist? No, I don't think it does yet.
What do you think?
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11th July 09, 01:47 AM
#2
I think the full mask sporrans are considered acceptable for all levels of dress.
So what would be needed is a pile of money, and a source of mask sporrans that are custom to your specs; like with magnetic snaps etc...
I suppose the choice of beast would be up to you, as well.
I tried to ask my inner curmudgeon before posting, but he sprayed me with the garden hose…
Yes, I have squirrels in my brain…
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11th July 09, 03:18 AM
#3
 Originally Posted by James MacMillan
Let's start with the attributes that I consider make a perfect sporran.
1. Large enough to hold everything that I normally carry.
2. Carry everything that I normally carry securely.
3. Allow easy, rapid access to all items. For me, this means compartments.
4. Constructed of good quality material, in my mind this means good quality leather.
5. Allow one-handed extraction of all contents.
6. Be appropriate for the activity.
Unless I am mis-understanding you, I think that you are asking the question backwards. As you have said, the activity in which you are participating dictates the sporran you are wearing. So firstly, one must identify what the activity is before identifying the attributes.
If the activity is casual, then there is every chance that there will be no jacket or shirt with pockets. The sporran would therefore have to be larger to accommodate all ones possessions.
If the activity is semi-formal, then a jacket (with or without waistcoat) will probably be worn. Even with a well tailored, close fitting, jacket there is room for pens, combs, billfolds and the like. This enable one to wear a slimmer sporran.
Formal and Uberformal events require a sporran to be showy rather than be functional. I can fit four £1 coins in my horsehair sporran and thats it. Maybe a cloakroom ticket at a push. But again, there are pockets in my doublet.
There can never be just one perfect sporran; there are too many different function for one item of clothing to cope with.
Last but not in any way least is our own personal favourites. I have quite a few sporrans, but my favourite is a simple black day sporran. I just love the sound of the tassles drumming as I walk along.
Regards
Chas
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11th July 09, 03:37 AM
#4
 Originally Posted by Chas
... I just love the sound of the tassles drumming as I walk along...
Now there's a funny thing Chas. The sound of the tassles drumming drives me bonkers so our ideal sporrans would be different it seems.
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11th July 09, 04:19 AM
#5
 Originally Posted by English Bloke
Now there's a funny thing Chas. The sound of the tassles drumming drives me bonkers so our ideal sporrans would be different it seems.
I tend to strut when I am kilted, so the drumming acts as an early warning device for other pedestrians.
Regards
Chas
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11th July 09, 04:30 AM
#6
 Originally Posted by Chas
I tend to strut when I am kilted, so the drumming acts as an early warning device for other pedestrians.
Regards
Chas
Or maybe it's your "theme song" entrance! lol
Frank
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11th July 09, 05:21 AM
#7
I think this just goes to show that we all have very different expectations of our sporrans.
Regards
Chas
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11th July 09, 06:10 AM
#8
When I wear a smaller semi-formal sporran, I need to wear the argyll jacket for its pockets just to carry the items that can normally fit in my all-leather day sporrans.
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11th July 09, 07:38 AM
#9
I tend to agree that we all have different ideas as to what is the ideal sporran. Roomier, fancier, plainer etc. And we all have different ideas as to what needs to fit inside. I have yet to see a sporran that would hold my digital slr with 70-300 zoom lens
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11th July 09, 01:47 PM
#10
 Originally Posted by Livingston
I tend to agree that we all have different ideas as to what is the ideal sporran. Roomier, fancier, plainer etc. And we all have different ideas as to what needs to fit inside. I have yet to see a sporran that would hold my digital slr with 70-300 zoom lens 
I've got a Canon 770 IS, perfect for when you can't bring a DSLR. Otherwise, you're going to need to a second bag for the camera.
Airman. Piper. Scholar. - Avatar: MacGregor Tartan
“KILT, n. A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.” - Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
www.melbournepipesanddrums.com
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