How's this for a response?

[Catdad]

While waiting for my wife to finish trying on some clothes tonight at Dress Barn, I had a woman ask me, "So what does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?" My answer was, "I don't know. I've never had the guts to ask one!"

Before she had a chance to ask a follow up, my wife was done and it was time to leave the store. When I relayed this story to her later, my wife laughed and said it was a great answer and suggest I tell it here and get additional feedback.

[Dall_Piobaire]

Your new name quick draw MacCatdad! I would have said lipstick and left her to figure it out!

[Alan H]

I've responded with Black leather and stainless steel.

[QMcK]

Great answer, catdad.

I might have said "I don't know - I've never been rude enough to ask one", just to let her know I'm a bit annoyed.

[JolyStNicholas]

All good answers indeed. My all time favorite is still "Me shoes and socks"!

[jeremy j starche]

Oh... I like the answer.

I think I'm going to steal it!

I was once stopped at the market by a woman who, in a /very/ loud voice did a:

"I've always wanted to know! What do you scotsmen wear under your kilt!"

Without missing a beat, I matched her voice:

"I've always wanted to know! What do you women wear under your skirt!"

There was dead silence in the meat department of Giant Eagle, until her husband started to giggle. She then fixed him with a death glare and moved on.

[BEAS]

To add to the socks and shoes I like to throw in a WEEEE bit of powder.
BEAS

[Sammac]

To add to the socks and shoes I like to throw in a WEEEE bit of powder.
BEAS

I prefer Body Glide to powder, no chafing

[The Thing]

I always say....I wouldn't know, but I can show you whats under an Irish man's

[werewolves]

Depending on the situation: "$5 and I'll show you, $10 and you can find out for yourself" works pretty well ;)