Irish Golfer and the Leprechaun

[Tartan Tess]

A golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods.

Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump
on his head and the golfer's ball beside him.

Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the
little guy, reviving him.

'Arrgh! What happened?' the Leprechaun asked.

'I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball,' the golfer says.

'Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya
want?'

'Thank God, you're all right!' the golfer answers in relief. 'I don't want
anything, I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize.'

And the golfer walks off.

'What a nice guy,' the Leprechaun says to himself.

I have to do something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want...
a great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.'

A year goes by and the golfer is back. On the same hole, he again hits a bad
drive into the woods and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.

'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here,' the little guy says. 'I just want to
ask ye, how's yer golf game?'

'My game is fantastic!' the golfer answers. I'm an internationally famous
golfer now.' He adds, 'By the way, it's good to see you're all right.'

'Oh, I'm fine now, thankye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell
me, how's yer money situation?'

'Why, it's just wonderful!' the golfer states. 'When I need cash, I just reach
in my pocket and pull out $100.00 bills I didn't even know were there!'

'I did that fer ye also.' And tell me, how's yer sex life?'

The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, 'It's
OK.'

C'mon, c'mon now,' urged the Leprechaun, 'I'm wanting to know if I did a good
job. How many times a week?'

Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, 'Once, sometimes
twice a week.'

'What??' responds the Leprechaun in shock. 'That's all? Only once or twice a
week?'

'Well,' says the golfer, 'I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest in a
small parish.'

[azwildcat96]

As I read, I kept wondering what the Tiger Woods punch line would be. I guess I was way off.

[piperdbh]

Foul on the play.

[Lallans]

A good joke needs a suprise punch line. As per a previous post, this one actually has two, the second being the non-use of Tiger.

[Tartan Tess]

Yeah, I know it's a hundred years old.....but Tiger Woods is new territory

[ForresterModern]

Long run for a short slide. But funny.

[ohiopiper]

Some jokes can elicit a chickle no matter how many times they are told. This is one of them. Gets a small giggle from me every time.