aid needed, ASAP

[MacLowlife]

I am supposed to give a brief ( "one drink" ) talk to my local St Andrew's Society on Curling. However, I know nothing about it and am confident that nobody else in attendance will, either. Instead, I intend to give a lengthy presentation so general and unhelpful that it could be about anything. My hope is that someone will notice the missing specifics- for instance where and how do you actually play the game- and find it funny.

And yes, I know, Curling is an olympic sport and people have seen it on TV.

So far, I have a list of curling equipment, such as curling pants, shoes and jerseys- with a special mention of the venerable curling houses, where equipment is stored and players might refresh themselves. At some point, I intend to work in my one prop- a curling iron.

I need help with a list of games that are either similar or might be ancestors of curling- I am particularly interested in any game that has Scots or Scotch in the title- like Hopscotch.

Clever lads will recognize this format as being stolen from that great philosopher, John Cleese http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbwkkXGmFrI

Oh, and I will be wearing my kilt whilst giving the presentation. See, it has to do with KILT ADVICE.

[New World Czech]

Well I hope you mention that curling should be played on a sheet, preferably a white one. Also someone gets hammered at the conclusion of each end.

[MacLowlife]

It just hit me, wouldn't it be fun to sprinkle ( in alphabetical order) the entire phonetic alphabet ( alpha Bravo Charlie) throughout the speech...

Thanks, Jack ( the president ) This is a room full of alpha dogs, isn't it? I'd just like to say Bravo to all of you for coming out. My brother Charlie and I were riding over here and I was thinking about the Delta. You know, echoes of that old foxtrot music. we roide past a golf course and a hotel and the sky was as black as India ink. My niece is going to be in Romeo and Juliet...

I don't know. It would have to be spread out a little more, but once people caught on, they would have to pay attention to see what was coming next...

[MNlad]

Don't forget, curling was invented by the Scots so spectators could be as bored in the winter as they are in the summer by golf—both are great for the sale of Scotch.

[McMurdo]

I know BobC is a curler he may be able to steer you in the right direction.

[Carlo]

Some games to consider:
Ancestor
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eisstockschiessen

Similar
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P%C3%A9tanque
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bowls

And Chess as it is a strategy game where you sometimes prefer to lose a stone to win the game.

[MacLowlife]

I like particular strategies- like the Ploughman's surprise or the King in the Attic ( sometimes called the double woodchuck) or the Milkmaid's downfall, not to mention the ever popular false fisherman's gambit. Now who couldn't win with one of those? Unless you encountered the outside wandering defense or maybe the three-six flyback...

[Carlo]

Curling is as far as I know more about:
Guards (Corner / Centre), Take-out (Double / Triple), Freeze, Hit and Roll
Maybe a food theme?

[Highlander31]

They use brooms in curling, as well. That should be good for at least a double-entendre (or two.)