I have been warned..

[Graham]

I had a spare hour before a radio broadcast tonight, it was just on dusk, there is a really nice trail along the river, so i thought I'd walk for an hour or so.
On the way a female jogger passed me.
On the way back she was there again, i said 'hello', she stopped and told me to be careful, there were "a lot of anti-"gay" people in the area" and that they might think I was "gay" and bash me.

I tried to explain that a kilt was a very masculine garment and that no such confusion should occur, but she just repeated the warning and ran off, like I should be grateful for her concern.

I was left wondering how such a strange attitude can be corrected - well it can't in 15 seconds of conversation.

The truth is, the town is question is a quiet, small, place with a large church-going population.
The only danger of being bashed would come from drunks, and that is small.

I have no concerns walking anywhere in this town after dark, kilted or otherwise.

I think she had the problem

[bubba]

That's peculiar. People sure can come up with some odd notions.

[Casey]

Man in a skirted garment, aka a kilt = gay

Narrow view of the world.

Casey

[Mychael Sporrano]

As always, we cannot know exactly what is going on in the minds of others, but she probably thought that she was was being helpful by offering words of advice designed to save you a potential "bashing" after the sun had gone down. From your wording, Graham, it sounds as though she didn't consider you gay, but guessed that others would. She based this strictly on your attire. As Casey wrote, "kilt = gay," in the minds of many. The woman may have meant well, but in a way her words come off to me as possibly being self-serving since she was in effect telling you that she was more enlightened than her fellow citizens who didn't know a kilt when they saw one.

Now, what are you supposed to do with this advice??? Exactly what you did, I suppose, especially the part where you reported back to this squad! You are right, there isn't any real way to enlighten folks met in passing since you have, typically, time for only a few sentences before parting. Depending on my mood and the situation, I either accept the advice politely or take exception.

Over the weekend, Karen and I were leaving a Chinese restaurant when a man who was entering said,"Nice skirt". Since the wife was wearing trousers and we we three were the only people in the picture, I knew he was referring to me. I didn't see his face as he was saying it, so I assumed that he was being sarcastic since "nice skirt" is not something one ordinarily says to another man whom you do not know! However, when I turned to make eye contact (I make it a point to do this when people are in close proximity, even when it is uncomfortable for me),I saw that he meant it as a compliment. I thanked him.

As has been discussed here in the past, a kilt *is* a skirt (I have come to terms with this), and he was going one way and I was going the other, so I didn't bother with my quick little "While this is technically a skirt, more accurately it is a kilt" spiel. He asked me where I got the skirt, I told him (Pittsburgh Kilts, which sort of alluded to its being a kilt and not a skirt), thanked him again for his nice words, and then went home to eat a take-out meal with an amused wife.

Mychael

[Graham]

Mychael, as always, you are spot on with your assessment.

I knew the lass meant well, tho I disagreed with her on a number of fronts.

I only wish I'd had more time to talk with her.
She actually seemed, for a fleeting moment, to be a sandwich short of a picnic, but I may be wrong.

She meant well, that's all. Now if she only knew that her words were being discussed all over the world that same day!!

After the evening in this local town I am happier than ever in a kilt and now care nothing at all for what anyone says.

Mind you, being in my new USAK Black Watch did help give me a boost.

[Rufus]

Being a female jogger, I'm guessing that she probably hears similar things all the time. "Watch out, there are some thugs over there!" "Watch out, Rocky's hiding in those bushes!" Etc...

She probably thought that she should try to share the same courtesy.

Or, like Graham said, she may just be nutters.

[Freelander Sporrano]

I'm with Rufus on this point.

And Graham if you have to go for a walk after dark "Don't go alone " Take the dog with you, or the wife .or both. Oh yes! and no handbag

Seriously
The jogger was just being well-meaning. She no doubt thought it a little stupid when she had time to think about what she had, in fact said

[Andrew]

I find it nice to hear that some stranger is looking out for your safety Graham, even though it was not needed. If she felt that she was doing some good be filling you in on what could happen to you at that time of night and being in a Kilt, then I guess it's best just to let her have her moment.
I probably would have just thanked her for the warning and told her that even if I was gay I don't think to many guys would be bothering with a 6'7" MAN who knows how to take care of his own. But that's just me.

[Mychael Sporrano]

Seriously The jogger was just being well-meaning. She no doubt thought it a little stupid when she had time to think about what she had, in fact said

The more that I think about it, the less I believe that she was well intentioned.

It wasn't a spontaneous utterance- the caveat she issued was premeditated. In other words, she had a chance to think about things from the point where she first passed Graham until she met up with him again on the flip side.

To me it comes off as an oddball comment to make to someone whom you do not know. Too vague to be of any real use, and beyond her simple acknowledgement of what Graham was wearing I cannot find a compliment in it- if that was even meant as a compliment, which I do not think it was. It would have been better to have said something along the lines of, " Nice kilt! Wow, it takes someone with courage to dress that differently around here." Instead, what I take away from the encounter is that she considered anyone who would dress like that in her and Graham's town as some sort of fool who needed to be warned for his own good.

Am I being overly cynical here?



Mychael

[Freelander Sporrano]

Am I being overly cynical here?

Sorry What I ment to write was that she was probably Well-meaning.

Why should she be out to hurt Grahams feelings or worse try to scare him