Supposed to be true:

Lawyer: Ma'am, are the two men who stole your purse and ran away with it in the courtroom today? (Raises his hand high and looks around the courtroom.)

Defendants raise their hands high too.

Defense Attorney: Your honor, my clients need to change their plea of "not guilty" to "guilty".


AND

What's the difference between a dead skunk and a dead lawyer on the highway?

The skidmarks in front of the skunk.