First off, I have a confession to make. Although I've spent many hours studying kilts, their construction, wearing, and tradition, styles, types, the various bits that go with them, and have purchased my first, I've yet to be kilted. I'm still patiently waiting for it. So naturally, the wearing and the resulting reactions are unknown to me. Which leads me to the next part.

I was talking to a girlfreind of my wife's the other day when she gets this smirk and says, "So Tanya tells me you're getting a kilt." My first thought was what the heck is she doing talking about that with the girls? I said, "Yeah, why?" "Oh nothing", she says. "She seemed "amused" at the idea."

Well how about that, huh? Now you tell me, how many things can "amused" mean in a given day? I'd never asked her opinion on it before since it's my a$$, and mine alone that'll be wearing it, but still. This discusion had me just the slightest bit concerned that she thought I'd slipped into an early mid-life crisis.

So I say to the wife, "I hear that me in a kilt amuses you. If you had a problem with it you should've said something before I ordered because the first thing I'm doing when it gets here is losing the pants."

"Actually," she says ,"the first thing you're doing when it gets here is take me for a walk around the neighborhood when all of the mothers are out for their morning walk." (there's a group of about a dozen every morning like clockwork) "Then you're taking me to, and picking me up from work so I can watch all of the girls' mouths drop. They are going to be so jealous of me. I can't wait!"

I guess amused is a good thing. I'm not sure how I'm going to handle the female attention (if there is any) when it comes. And hey, if she wants to show me off like a prize pig, then I guess I could get used to it. There are worse things in life....like being without Guinness, or having your whatzits caught in a mouse trap or something.