I'm a licensed professional counselor working at an outpatient mental health agency in the canyonlands of Arizona (Redneck, Navajo, Mormon country).

I know kilts are not a costume. Just figured today would be a good day to wear the kilt and blend in with other Halloween costumes. Last year the CEO came in hillbilly drag...dress, wig, etc.

This year no one came in costume. Two ladies wore orange blouses, one painted her fingernails black.

I wore my UK tan original with SportKilt's navy hose, black wingtips and a navy ribbed sweater. Wore the AK wide black belt too, but the sweater covered it.

First encounter, the Navajo who runs our detox center called my kilt a skirt. Told him Navajo Warriors wore deerskin kilts. The CEO came along and said no they didn't...the Navajo guy said yes they did.

CEO kept looking at the kilt - he's seen me kilted before at the hardware store on a weekend. He finally decided to tell me that I was just wearing the kilt to show off.

The receptionist asked me what I was wearing under the kilt. Told her if she was wearing a skirt and I asked her the same question I'd be both fired and arrested...she thought that one over and agreed. (for the record I wore a pair of boxer shorts...why take risks the first day kilted at work)

A lady admin clerk asked if the side pockets were where I kept my nylons.

I got "The Look" from many people who never commented, including our young developmentally disabled janitors.

A young Mormon male therapist gave thumbs up and compliments.

Working a crisis phone call with a sucidal lady the same clerk with the nylons comment walked by and said that all my clients were probably suicidal because I was wearing a kilt today.

A female therapist my age (I be 60) asked if I was scotch. Explained the difference between people and whisky.

My first face-o-face client is a young lady in recovery from methamphetamine dependence. She never mentioned the kilt.

My next client was a patient with schizophrenia. He just asked seriously, "Where's your tartan?" Explained Utilikilts to him and went on with the session with no further mention of the kilt.

We took more crisis calls than normal in the early afternoon and the nylons clerk commented again that it was all due to my being kilted today (yes, she is merciless and most people don't like her much).

A client support lady who is English called my UK a skirt. Told her you of all people should know a kilt. She responded by asking where my sporran was. Told her it was a Utilikilt and I used the side pockets...she then asked if I put my testicles in the side pockets, left testicle in the left pocket, right testicle in the right pocket. Then she stuck her shoe between my shoes as if to do a kilt check with patent leather shoes. I pointed out that if I'd made the same type comments to her and stuck my foot under her dress like that I'd be both fired and arrested. She agreed, then asked where my tartan was. At least she was keeping up with my client with schizophrenia.

Knowing an intoxicated client was on the way to the agency I was warning the receptionist when the nylons clerk walked over and said the drunk would probably put the moves on me because I was kilted.

Turns out he was very intoxicated, but he never made a comment about the kilt while we got him the help he needed.

Just before we closed the nylons clerk lady came to me and said I was fun to tease. I told her she did it well.

Other coworkers didn't comment, just accepted.

This is by far the worst teasing, joking, etc. I experienced since I wore my first kilt. Guessing a lot is because I've known these folks for four years and we're often working at a deep life or death level with intense situations.

Still not sure wearing kilts for everyday would work. But I have a week to decide if it will work again next week on our unofficial casual dress Fridays.

One big worry, sitting across from clients in therapy and distracting them and having to watch how I sat, went away. Didn't have trouble maintaining a modest sitting posture and there was no distraction.

A nice thing about my agency is that its big. So after I meet a client in the lobby there's still a long walk to my office to get through any distraction or comments.

I think going kilted about town is helping too. The female client that didn't comment has seem me kilted around town many times.

So, once again, the worst things that I ever experienced never actually happened.

Risking works!

Ron

And, hey, the SportKilt hose held up well all day without garters.