My bank manager will be seriously annoyed, and he knows where I live: but how can I be blamed?

When after seeing pictures of the 'Highland Granite' kilt-I rushed out-well to the keyboard and ordered another-yes another Hector Russell Hillwalker-the act I would suggest of any rational being: but will my bank agree-I know it will not.

So if when in London you espy a smartly kilterd beggar-spare a copper-better still silver, and I'd not turn my nose up at notes--here I'd better mention that I accept all major credit cards, and cashiers cheques.

Destitute and with children starving and without a crust to eat or a roof over my head here in the bleak wastes of Europe--I can only blame those callous unthinking souls who put temptation in my path. Shame on you.

James