I can hear you're pretty choked Dave, but don't dispair. I too purchased a SportKilt and initially was disappointed. Like your wife though, I could see it was fixable. I ordered a medium and was sent a large, so I got extra wrap on the under apron, which was probably a good thing. But I did have to move loads of velcro so that the thing would stay on me and too, I had to move a couple of belt loops. It only has about half the pleats that my Stillwaters do, but they hang pretty well. I may go so far as to sew the edges of the pleats so I can forego ironing it after a wash. Isn't that first pleat on the left side of the apron a honkin one? Mine is 10 inches from edge to edge with 8 inches hidden under the apron. I'm sure there's a reason for this- probably to prevent restricting my leg movement when I'm practicing ballet moves. In your case it won't bind when you're chasing down a wounded deer. ;-) Now mine is made from a poly blend while yours is, as you say, canvas. (Officially cotton duck- the same material that UK workmans are made of.) There's been at least one thread on this forum discussing ways to soften it up, so you might do a search for that information. The saddle bag on my commuter bicycle is made of this stuff. It's survived about 12 years of daily abuse and could probably survive atmospheric re-entry. Count your blessings, this just may be a contemporary kilt that can last a few generations. You (or your dear wife) will just have to whip it into shape. My experience is that nearly all of my kilts have needed some kind of tweaking.

Best of luck buddy,
Vincent