Scotland The Brave(Comic Version)

Land o' the purple heather Land o' the dirty weather Land where the midges gaither Scotland The Brave.

Land o' the pakistanis Andy Capp and Saturday,s Sannies Land where they sell their grannies Scotland The Brave

Used to say in faithers day You could hear the bagpipes play But now you hear the regal tones O' Elton John and the Rolling Stones Land that is full of stinkers ? ? and ? drinkers Whisky put a lot o'stinkers Into Scottish graves

Land that is full o' skivvers Comic Singers, deep sea divers Turbans on our bus'kin' drivers Scotland The Brave

Land o' the brutal bobbies Councillers wi' part-time jobbies ("Aye, if the shoe fits, wear it!" verbal by Roy) Architects wi' paying hobbies Scotland The Brave

The tourists come here every year to see all our historic gear But all they see is loads o' navvies High rise flats wi' concrete lavvies Land o' the "Artic" lorries, Andy Stewart, and ra Corries ? ? ? ? ? ? Scotland The Brave

Land o' the Kilt and Sporran Underneath there,s nothing worn! How I wish the wind was warm! Scotland The Brave

I must admit it,s pretty gruesome walking around with a frozen twosome! It,s all we,ve got we mus,nt lose them! Scotland The Brave

Conservatives try to assure us Labour,s hard put to endure us The kirk puts curbs on our enjoyment Government makes unemployment! Never mind, the day is near When independence will be here We,ll drink a toast in Youngers Beer To Scotland The Brave!