Most Physically Painful Kilt Experience?

[Bugbear]

I have three cats with all their claws. My brother brought his yappy little dog over to the house, and in an effort to escape, all three decided to climb me, starting at my legs. They clawed their way up my body, Midnight taking the kilt with him.

[Mickey]

Weird that this came up as earlier I was outside and a rather menacing looking wasp found me very interesting, and I almost went into a panic when it flew low and I lost sight of it. I didn't move for about 15 minutes. Thought about asking a question similar to this.

Ron, the fried huevos still cracks me the heck up. I feel the pain, but man.... outstandingly funny

Nighthawk, my cat LOVES kilts, and loves trying to get under them. I've crouched down many times and had her magically appear in the "cave" and wow, those are tense moments.

I have been very lucky so far, but I know it's only a matter of time.

[TheBrus]

Outdoors in windy Central Iowa, in January, regimental. Frostbite nearly ensued. Bag balm to the rescue!

[Hocfutue]

WWII reenactment, Fall of France/Dunkirk scenario, several kilted as Queen's Own Camerons.

Passing through brush, the sergeant spotted something, ordered us to kneel. I did so quickly, and caught a square yard of dry grass and brambles.

Later dove for cover behind a fallen log. Which irritated the great number of spiders, ants, and other creepy crawlies who then went looking for another dark, warm place to hide.

Final straw was riding in the Bren carrier, a small tracked British vehicle that has the engine in the back--under where the passengers are. Blowing hot exhaust straight up.

We showed up in trousers for day 2...

[Dale Seago]

Samhain/Hallowe'en party, dressed in a feileadh mor. The hosts were Buchanans, and parents to one of my black belt level martial art students (who was also there), and so were all accustomed to wearing Highland attire and seeing me in various forms thereof.

The veil between the worlds was thin that night, so thin I felt I nearly passed through myself. Shortly after arriving I felt this sort of burbling thing going on in my lower tract. Then cramps were added. Then nausea. Then. . .

Then I remembered a burger I'd had earlier on leaving a security consulting gig down the Peninsula, at a little restaurant I'd never been in before.

It only counts because I was wearing some sort of kilt; but it WAS a really grim 24 hours or so.

[Bugbear]

Ya, Dale, I had food poisoning once; it is horrendous.

I've got to ask... could it have been... deliberate...?

[Ancienne Alliance]

A while ago, I was walking back from a gig not far away from home. I've had a few drinks so I left my car on the parking near the Town House; I would come and fetch it the next day.
Now I had to cross this very old forest called “La forêt des Fayes”. I usually use my cell-phone as a flash light, but is was full moon and I could see the road in spite of the trees.
There is a bent in the road where lies a very big mossy stone. I was just going around it when I saw three hooded ladies that just slipped out of the dark as if they where actually coming out of the stone itself. I was very impressed.
Being a gentleman, I saluted them with the usual “Bonsoir, Mesdames”.

Before I new what was happening I was swept off the ground and flying in the air above the trees. The “ladies” chuckled in a deep, low pitched voice. They where holding on to me so closely I could smell their breath; dead leaves and wet potato bags...

We finally arrived to a cave, up in the mountain where a fourth dame was there, visibly expecting our party. They all cast down their hoods. All had very long white hair beaming in the moonlight gushing from the cave's entrance. “Well, aren't you going to play for us, gentle piper?” For obvious reasons, I immediately proceeded to set up my pipes, roughly tuning them.

Something in particular, Mesdames?
Just play !

So I started playing the intro of Phil Collin's “Against all odds”. Proceeding with the song itself, all four of them started swaying, slowly and sensually bringing their hands from their thighs up to their shoulders and neck; plunging them in their think hair before raising their arms above their head, their white hair falling and flowing all around their bodies as in slow motion.

I just kept playing for hours, without a dram !
My mouth was so dry... It was horrible. I probably fainted in exhaustion.
When I woke up, I was wrapped up in my Day's plaid, lying on my chalet's front porch.

A terrible experience for sure !


Best,

Robert

[JSFMACLJR]

My wife and I were in Scotland, driving up from Oban to Duror on the A828. We pulled over to the side of the road to take a photo of Castle Stalker. I slipped on a wee patch of ice and fell, banging up both knees and an elbow, sprawling out onto the road with my kilt up around my chest, Bleeding, exposed, aching, and embarrassed, I must have been a sight to the traffic driving up the hill before I was able to get up!

[Jerry]

Mine was the first time I went, regimental to a Celtic festival. At one venue, there were a lot of hay bales for seats. They were fairly low, and I have arthritic knees, so sitting down involves, an approach then a kind of controlled fall to the seat as my knees give out. As I sat,fell, I released the pleats and used my hand to catch myself as I landed, not completely on the pleats. There were a lot of loose straws sticking up at odd angles. Some of which managed to jab me in the...., Well, I'm sure you can picture it.

In a related, but not painful incident, my Aussie mix canine companion, Dakota, decided to answer the question for herself shortly after coming in from being outside
and engaging in her favorite winter past time of poking her nose in the snow. A normally cold nose was freezing cold and to say the least it was a shock.

Needless to say, I've kind of given up on the whole regimental thing.

[Jerry]

Sorry