Meghan Walker's wedding plans

[Detroitpete]

You COULD be brought in sitting on cabers carried by Highland Athletes...I mean, what is a wedding without cabers?????

[Meggers]

Fusion can work well, I am Catholic and my wife is Protestant, we had Mass at 7 am and service at her church at noon for our wedding. She is Chinese and I am Irish. We had Chinese food and live Irish traditional music at the reception. And just for good measure we had Jewish friends pray a traditional prayer and add Jewish food before we ate.

I know that our Pakistani wedding will be 100% Pakistani with next to no fusion from my culture at all conidering I will be the only white person there. lol. I actually don't mind it though because I know that the ceremony that we have here will have a lot more from my culture represented (if not MOST of it considering we get to have such a large desi wedding on his side). Besides, it's kind of cool to dress differently and throw yourself into something that most Irish/Scot-Americans don't get to fully experience. I want him to have the same sort of thing with the American ceremony. He's never seen an American wedding and I'd like to show him one even though ours wont be the traditional sort in a church with a minister. We'd have to think of something else there.

The nice thing about this is that a lot of intercultural marriages require one party to assimilate more than the other and usually I am the one that always is forced to sacrifice. This time, I'm not and I'm very happy about that. I love his culture but I also love my own and my heritage is definitely a culture rich in beauty and traditions that my partner should fully appreciate. On that note, I texted him with a sad face last night saying that kilts don't fall below the knee (Muslim men must cover at least above naval to below the knee) and he simply said that we'd figure it out. He didn't say "Oh well. No kilt I guess!" It really made me happy that he said that because it shows his willingness to work with my culture without simply throwing it out without any kind of tweaking if it's not fitting in with something we believe in. He's very very good about that and one of the reasons why he's such a keeper. That kind of person is very rare.

Actually, it would be nice to have some sort of advice regarding the below-the-knee requirement for men wearing a kilt. I asked on another thread if it is too short if it is below the knee and most posters were adamently supportive of above-the-knee or right-at-the-knee kilt length. Do you think there's anything we could do that would make the kilt long enough but still look sharp?

[Father Bill]

Long enough for what? To cover our . . . . ?

[Meggers]

Long enough for what? To cover our . . . . ?

right below the knee. Is it in bad taste to wear the kilt that low? I know most men wear theirs right at the knee or right above it.

[cruiser348]

I attended a Pakistani wedding reception a couple of years ago (they didn't allow non-muslims to attend the actual ceremony) and must say that as far as the weddings I have been to it was the only one where the attire worn by the wedding party had any chance of rivaling a highland attired wedding in terms of color pallet and flash. Quite lovely in fact. I wasn't a huge fan of the requirement that men and women sit on opposite sides of the hall during the meal, but other than that I enjoyed it. Especially, given that the brother-in-law of the bride is part owner of a Greek restaurant so the food was quite good.

[Father Bill]

right below the knee. Is it in bad taste to wear the kilt that low? I know most men wear theirs right at the knee or right above it.

Yeah . . . worn below mid knee is usually a sign of somebody with no real kilt experience. They just don't belong there.

[Meggers]

Yeah . . . worn below mid knee is usually a sign of somebody with no real kilt experience. They just don't belong there.

but I mean Muslim males have to cover from navel to knee...so if he cant have his kilt a little past the knee cap then hes just out of luck? I want to find a way that he can wear a kilt and still abide by the religion.

It's up to him in the end. If he's uncomfortable showing his knee caps then I guess we will have to pass on him wearing a kilt...if he is ok with it then he can wear one. It's up to him.

[Lime]

Do you think there's anything we could do that would make the kilt long enough but still look sharp?

It is possible but would probably fall within the "modern" rather than "traditional" category of kilt wearing. If you glance through the galleries on www.21stcenturykilts.com you will see that Howie's kilts are generally cut (or worn) below the knee; the secret seems to be that there is at least some gap between the bottom of the kilt and the hose. So if the kilt is worn low then the hose are worn lower to compensate. Whether it looks "sharp" is certainly open to discussion but it may be the best given the circumstances; the alternative being stockings or a floor length kilt!

[Meggers]

I attended a Pakistani wedding reception a couple of years ago (they didn't allow non-muslims to attend the actual ceremony) and must say that as far as the weddings I have been to it was the only one where the attire worn by the wedding party had any chance of rivaling a highland attired wedding in terms of color pallet and flash. Quite lovely in fact. I wasn't a huge fan of the requirement that men and women sit on opposite sides of the hall during the meal, but other than that I enjoyed it. Especially, given that the brother-in-law of the bride is part owner of a Greek restaurant so the food was quite good.

Yeah, our nikkah (the actual marriage part of the ceremony) will more than likely just be done with an Imam, witnesses, and all who need to be there. The mendhi and the party afterwards are for everyone to attend.

It is possible but would probably fall within the "modern" rather than "traditional" category of kilt wearing. If you glance through the galleries on www.21stcenturykilts.com you will see that Howie's kilts are generally cut (or worn) below the knee; the secret seems to be that there is at least some gap between the bottom of the kilt and the hose. So if the kilt is worn low then the hose are worn lower to compensate. Whether it looks "sharp" is certainly open to discussion but it may be the best given the circumstances; the alternative being stockings or a floor length kilt!

Those aren't terribly bad. I think if it hits mid-knee then it should be ok. I will let him try out different ideas and we can come up with one when it's time. We have quite a long wait ahead of us anyway. I just want to make sure we aren't ditching our religious beliefs for fashion rules. I have to make do with a floor length or calf length skirt so we can think of something religiously appropriate for him too.

IF all else fails, he could always wear a neutral toned shalwar kameez with a tartan dupatta hanging around his neck. That might make him more comfortable anyway...

even though it's not the same

[LANCER1562]

Meghan,

I have a great kilt that I wear to Renissance fairs that comes well below my knees. I fact it almost toches the tops of my moccasin boots that I wear with it. You might look into something like that.