A bit of humor...

[kilted hillbilly]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ALERTS TO TERROR THREATS IN 2011 EUROPE


> > The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist
> > threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed"
> > to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to
> > "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross."
> >
> > The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when
> > tea supplies nearly ran out.
> >
> > Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody
> > Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning
> > level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
> >
> > The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's
> > Get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason
> > they
> > have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300
> > years.
> >
> > The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror
> > alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels
> > in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was
> > precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag
> > factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.
> >
> > Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly"
> > to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain:
> > "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."
> >
> > The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful
> > Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have
> > two
> > higher
> > levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."
> >
> > Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only
> > threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
> >
> > The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to
> > deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new
> > Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
> >
> > Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries"
> > to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain:
> > "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and
> > "The barbie is canceled." So far, no situation has ever warranted use of
> > the
> > final escalation level.
> >
> > John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person - and of Monty Python films
Please dont be offended, all in good fun-kilted hillbilly

[ccga3359]

[Mark R]

Has to be some truth for humor to be funny.

[zirrow]

[Dajo95]

Dang it! That was hilarious but I was hoping for a jab at us Americans... Probably too easy

[kilted hillbilly]

Dang it! That was hilarious but I was hoping for a jab at us Americans... Probably too easy

We could do some, Jeff Foxworthy did the redneck thing,it applys to alot of us. Lets make one for us Americans.

[zirrow]

It would have to include new full-cavity searches by the TSA for all passengers boarding any plane, bus, or train and then giving up additional freedoms for a false sense of security. All followed by a blundering leader standing up to proclaim that he, himself, had taken out the terrorist threat.

[kilted hillbilly]

I can think of many an American leader, from both parties, that this would apply to!

[zirrow]

Exactly!

[Jordan]

I posted this on another forum I'm a member of a while back to great success. It comes around Every so often, I do like it.