handfasting

[Tenire]

Whoa, hold on, my friends... We're not even up to the wedding yet..

After thinking about this, and talking with her, I truly think this is going to be a rather informal affair. Niether of us really stand on protocols and ceremonies. And the one thing that is a constant between us is a certain silly love that keeps us laughing even when things get tense. I work oilfield rentals, so that happens pretty regular.

I kinda think the Jacobite ensemble, with a TX Bluebonnet really suits me. The more I think about it, the more I lean in that direction. As much as I would like to have my best buds standing with me all kilted up, I know they'll all balk at the idea of a 'skirt'. So in the end it'll be me and the High Priestess and my Lady. With that in mind, part of me wants to BE the resplendent peacock, in his Prince Charlie, with all the bells and whistles and shiny little details, to match the shining glory that she just IS in my eyes. (She'd argue, of course, and tell you she's just as plain as any girl and that I'm all that.)

Curiouser, and curiouser, I swear..

[Lyle1]

if you do a search on Google, you'll find quite a bit on the subject of handfasting. In short it is a temporary, sometimes called a left-handed, wedding or betrothal, somewhat akin to a common law marriage, but not as formal. At the end of the set term, the man (usually) could agree to marry the women, and legitimatize any children, or, he could send her packing if he wasn't completely happy with her. I suspect that you are looking for a somewhat more romanticized meaning.

[Redhawk]

Daniel (Ragnawolf) did a Handfasting with my daughter (not actually related but grew up hanging out in my home with my kids) this past May. A weding date is set "a year and a day" from the date. It was very informal......

[SlackerDrummer]

Perhaps it depends on where one is located. At the recent weddings that I've been to during the morning and afternoon the groom and attendants have worn morning dress.

Maybe, but also I think it must depend on where you glean your advice. I have been to many weddings in the Eastern US mostly in Maryland, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, Ohio, and Kentucky. With two exceptions (one of which was a second marriage and low-key; the other a high-society wedding and morning dress) all were black tie for the wedding party regardless of the time of day. I did go to a wedding in Cape Cod where the men were in khakis and sport coats, but it was also on the water and the bride wore a flowered cocktail dress. Any time spent looking at the work of wedding photographers, brides' magazines, bridal shows, etc. will inform you that the tuxedo in various forms is the go-to attire for a wedding party in modern America. I never suggested that morning dress was a dead tradition, but it is the exception to the rule. I understand that you wore morning dress at your wedding and likely you and your friends (assuming you did not crash the recent weddings you attended) have been informed by the same influences. I don't know why you shy away from the idea that you are not commonplace.

[Seawolf]

So for what it is worth, I believe that whatever you and your lass agree on has to be right for BOTH of you. You as a couple together make this commitment. I am married to the same beautiful Lass for going on 40 and 1 and I wouldn't change a thing. So...all I can offer is the following:
May you have,
Walls for the wind
And a roof for the rain,
And drinks bedside the fire
Laughter to cheer you
And those you love near you,
And all that your heart may desire

Slainte mhor agus a h-uile beannachd duibh
(Good health and every good blessing to you)

Seawolf

[Deirachel]

Feel the need to correct some things.

Handfasting is, unfortunately, not a cut and dry thing.

For some, handfasting is a set period. For others, handfasting is forever (it is the wedding). It also depends on what level of LEGALITY the person wishes to make it. For the first, usually there is no court involvment; for the second, of course one has to have a marriage license. Also, the "set period" can be indefinite (one ritual I've used is "a year and a day, or as long as love lasts")

In the case of the OP, it appears to be a set period concept. So, wear what you want. But, your question was really about what TARTAN to wear. At the moment, I would look into a Regional, American, or Universal Sett; the Bluebonnett would be a great choice, but you can consider Scottish National, American National, Scottish-American, the various Military Honorary tartans if you are/were military. I would be careful of adopting your lady's tartan as you may find there are some #$Q%^@!s out there who would be offended if you do it BEFORE you are married. Additionally, the tradition is the other way around; the wife takes the husband's tartan.

For course, the choice is yours.