Earings male

[Jock Scot]

JohntheBiker

I think it would be unrealistic and even perhaps unwise to assume that because those around you have made no comment about you(any of us for that matter) and your assorted attire-----any attire---, they could well be silently forming an opinion , which might, or might not, be a thumbs up for your attire -------and you. Its almost inevitable if you are stading out from the crowd

Just saying.

[sailortats]

For black tie and higher levels of dress, I personally would suggest leaving off the earrings. These levels of formality are different from the lower levels, and are not intended for making personal "look at me" statements. There is wiggle room for personalised touches in formal attire, to be sure, but only within the confines of tradition (if one expects to pull it off with good taste, that is).

Just my opinion.

Tobus, I disagree with you here. As I wear earrings daily, year around, I would wear them to a white tie event at the White House, if invited to one. I certainly would not consider it in bad taste to do so. It is who I am. And I certainly do not wear them as a "hey look at me" statement.

[Tobus]

Tobus, I disagree with you here. As I wear earrings daily, year around, I would wear them to a white tie event at the White House, if invited to one. I certainly would not consider it in bad taste to do so. It is who I am. And I certainly do not wear them as a "hey look at me" statement.

But you do understand that not everyone sees it that way, yes? I know there's a modern American flair for individuality all the time, and a firm "I'll be who I want to be, and you can't tell me otherwise" attitude, but black tie and white tie are dress codes which exist specifically to take away such individualistic expressions in the manner of dress for an evening. This is why the rules are so narrow on what's acceptable. It is the distinct opposite of making a statement of individuality, and in many circles it is indeed considered bad taste to go outside the convention. Whether you do it or not is completely irrelevant to that.

Of course, Highland black tie equivalent does offer a bit more leeway, given the nature of Highland attire. But I dare say that earrings on men have not yet broken through the fairly conservative boundaries which still exist amongst the social circles who typically attend black tie events. A lot will depend on the event itself, the location, etc. So it's not a universal thing.

But still, as a general rule of thumb, if one is invited to a black tie or white tie event with an unfamiliar group, it's best to play it safe and dress on the conservative side (meaning, no earrings). No one ever faults a man for dressing conservatively at this level of dress. Any disapproving sentiments of poor taste will come only from going outside the convention.

[masiaka]

But you do understand that not everyone sees it that way, yes? I know there's a modern American flair for individuality all the time, and a firm "I'll be who I want to be, and you can't tell me otherwise" attitude, but black tie and white tie are dress codes which exist specifically to take away such individualistic expressions in the manner of dress for an evening. This is why the rules are so narrow...

Historically speaking: morning dress, evening dress, white tie, business dress, etc were not designed to take away personal flare on any level. They were merely the most common fashions of the victorian era for different occasions that crystallized in certain ways. The conventions are narrow because that was what the fashions were at the time that dress crystallized, but there are few hard rules if any. Hence the trend in black and white tie for narrow, notched lapels right now while shawl collars were the most common in the Victorian era and peaked collars thereafter. Black was the most popular color for men (navy being a historical alternate) with black or maroon accents, in the Victorian era, colors were reserved for women's dresses. (White jackets were introduced to differentiate house guest from staff at black tie events while maintaining the same level of formality for each.) The lack of color for men was a form of chivalry, it made his date look more striking. With the movement for the equality of the sexes it is now appropriate for women to wear a "little black dress" but also for men to accent their tuxedo suit with colors historically reserved for ladies. Except for a few cases, what we think of as "traditional" is actually fairly new historically and what we consider to be rules are much more flexible than they seem on the surface.

[sailortats]

Tobus, you are thinking of earrings as part of the outfit one wears. They are no more part of the outfit than an eye patch might be or rings on the fingers or a hearing aid. These things are in essense part of the person wearing them not part of the clothing they are wearing. Most men when wearing a earring or stud never bother to take them out. They are there 24/7, even in the shower.

[dadgad]

I proudly have no piercings or tattoos. I am an individual...a leader, not a follower.

Yup

[JohntheBiker]

JohntheBiker

I think it would be unrealistic and even perhaps unwise to assume that because those around you have made no comment about you(any of us for that matter) and your assorted attire-----any attire---, they could well be silently forming an opinion , which might, or might not, be a thumbs up for your attire -------and you. Its almost inevitable if you are stading out from the crowd

Just saying.

You're right. A lack of comment is not necessarily an objective test of the appropriateness of one's attire. I was merely suggesting that wearing a suitable earing with formal wear was not worthy of comment in this day and age. In most instances, I would probably forgo it, but I wouldn't find it out of place if someone else were to wear one.

At my age, I rely on my own experience, my own taste, my own style and a well-developed sense of etiquette in deciding what is appropriate in a given set of circumstances. I happen to believe, as I think you do, that in a social setting dressing appropriately is just good manners. However, as a regular kilt wearer, I am quite prepared to stand out from the crowd.

Thanks for your perspective.

[Tobus]

Historically speaking: morning dress, evening dress, white tie, business dress, etc were not designed to take away personal flare on any level. They were merely the most common fashions of the victorian era for different occasions that crystallized in certain ways. The conventions are narrow because that was what the fashions were at the time that dress crystallized, but there are few hard rules if any. Hence the trend in black and white tie for narrow, notched lapels right now while shawl collars were the most common in the Victorian era and peaked collars thereafter. Black was the most popular color for men (navy being a historical alternate) with black or maroon accents, in the Victorian era, colors were reserved for women's dresses. (White jackets were introduced to differentiate house guest from staff at black tie events while maintaining the same level of formality for each.) The lack of color for men was a form of chivalry, it made his date look more striking. With the movement for the equality of the sexes it is now appropriate for women to wear a "little black dress" but also for men to accent their tuxedo suit with colors historically reserved for ladies. Except for a few cases, what we think of as "traditional" is actually fairly new historically and what we consider to be rules are much more flexible than they seem on the surface.

There's no doubt that what we call "black tie" today didn't just appear as "black tie" one day. It evolved from fashions of the times; I agree on that. Although I am led to believe that while white tie was de rigeur during Victorian times, black tie was a fashion that happened well after the Victorian era. Regardless, it has taken form as a tradition based on that particular fashion. And while even traditions aren't written in stone, they do evolve very slowly.

The size and shape of lapels, collars, etc., are all part of the narrow range I mentioned. These are clearly within the convention. But while earrings may now be acceptable in casual society at large (they are still very much frowned upon in certain circles), I still doubt their place when dressing formally.

Tobus, you are thinking of earrings as part of the outfit one wears. They are no more part of the outfit than an eye patch might be or rings on the fingers or a hearing aid. These things are in essense part of the person wearing them not part of the clothing they are wearing. Most men when wearing a earring or stud never bother to take them out. They are there 24/7, even in the shower.

Oh, come now. Excluding surgical implants and permanent piercings, which are a small minority, earrings are simply jewelry. Just because a person might normally wear it doesn't have any bearing on whether it's appropriate for black tie. Trying to put earrings in the same category as medical items like eye patches or hearing aids is stretching the truth a bit, wouldn't you say?

If it's a permanently fixed item or a tattoo, then the wearer really has no choice. But I'm talking about a simple earring, where the person has a choice to put it on or not, regardless of whether it's part of his usual fare or not. Just because a guy wears a trucker hat every day as part of his 'image' doesn't make it any more appropriate for black tie than an earring either.

Sorry to be the party pooper here, but it's not like this is shocking news. I think some folks on this forum tend to believe that wanting something to be acceptable is going to make it so, and that just isn't necessarily true.

[Old Hippie]

Depends on where you are, like just about everything. I was raised in a culture that believed your manliness was in question if you had an ear pierced. Then I worked on the sea and all the real fishermen had an earring. Then I was in the military where it was taboo, and later spent time on the road with a group of motorcycle enthusiasts who had earrings and tattoos, most of them. A lot of us, including me, have a left earlobe piercing. Then along came the punks with rows of chrome spikes pierced in their cartilage, bars and CBRs and tunnels and all kinds of hardware installed in places I would not personally want drilled out. And some young guys were getting both ears pierced, which seemed a little strange to some with only one.

I often wear a tiny little amethyst stud, on the principle that any person can look at my ear and see the hole if I'm not wearing one. I'm comfortable toning down my personal performance. I'm also in a culture and region where such things are not grounds for comment or approbation. There are still some who will, but it's a great excuse to kill 'em with kindness.

My late step-mother-in-law once took me to task in a restaurant for having an earring and tattoos. "Disgusting!" she snorted. Her husband tried to sound a reasonable tone but she was having none of it. I just smiled and reminded her that she had twice as many ears pierced as I did, she had had several elective cosmetic surgeries, and with her tattooed eyeliner and eye shadow she was showing a lot more ink than I was showing at that moment. "Oh, yours is just for decoration!" she fired back. "Mine was necessary." I just winked at my father-in-law and kept my mouth shut.

I guess what I'm saying is I'm fortunate to live in a place where it's not remarkable, with a social position that allows me such eccentricity with no penalty, but your mileage may vary.

[Lyle1]

But I dare say that earrings on men have not yet broken through the fairly conservative boundaries which still exist amongst the social circles who typically attend black tie events. A lot will depend on the event itself, the location, etc. So it's not a universal thing.

I think you are about twenty years behind the times in terms of what is acceptable at "black tie" events in many metropolitan areas of the United States. A man wearing an earring might turn a few heads at a formal event in the Texas Hill Country, but not so much in many other parts of the country, unless the earring was really outrageous or inappropriate.