Wearing pants is a no win situation.

If you wear your pants loose and baggy, you have pockets of trapped hot moist air. Bare skin rubs together. Ow. Wear them with the crotch around your knees like some folks, and you look stupid. So, you get tired of skin on skin rubbing together, and, to put the fire out in your loins, you hike your pants up. Next thing you know, that galldarn seam feels like a piece of barbwire feeling you up. You just grin and bear it, trying to use the crotch of your jeans like a sponge to sop up all that swampy moisture down in your dangly bits. You can't stand the cutting, so, you shimmy your pants down a bit lower on your hips, and the cycle continues.

Why do we do this to our selves? Why? I keep asking my self that as of late. I have no answer. None at all. I have no excuses. All I can do is hang my head in shame for what I have done to my self. I could have avoided much agony had I done something, anything, sooner.

Is it a cultural bias? I live in the South. Down here, men wearing any sort of skirted garmet is considered a homosexual. At least in my tiny pocket of the South. I already know I am bound to get my self in trouble. I am more then prepared. My fists are the size of Hostess Canned Hams. And I am a little short angry fellow. While I can't say I have won every fight I got my self into, I can say that I have always, with out fail, made the other guy look worse than I did. So I obviously have the huevos to have shrugged off the local culture and wear a kilt a long time ago. So why didn't I? I thought about it. I have always thought about it. I just never got around to doing it. It was always a flight of fancy or just an idea. Never seemed practical. Perhaps a part of me thought a 5 foot 5 Hispanic Native American would look goofy in a kilt?

Pants have always been a problem for me. I am a short stocky man. Not fat mind you, stocky. Finding a pair of pants with a size 28 leg and a 38 inch waist has always been a pain in the ****. I have to buy and hem them my self to make them shorter. Bloody pain the ****. Kilts have no such problem!! So why then, did I wear pants for so many years? I do not have an answer. So much trouble to try and find a pair of pants that fit well. I could go to a store, find three pairs of pants, all by the same manufacturer, all the same size measurements, and what do you know, all three would fit differently. But they were all the same. So why go through all this trouble? I thought men were all about saving time and getting to the point? Wearing a kilt, at least it seems to me, is more to the point.

I will be making an order next month. I am still debating what to get, I am still torn between an Amerikilt, a Bear Kilt, or a Utilikilt. I feel like a prisoner counting the days till he goes free or manages to escape. I can see freedom, and will be reaching for it soon.

I am glad I have found a gathering place of like minded souls that might share my pain.