kilt lifters

[Enzayer]

That would be great! Now all i need is money for all this stuff.

[Thistle Stop]

OK, Here's the new T-shirt:

'Official Secrets Act' T-Shirt (Click to link to catalogue page.)



'Official Secrets Act' T-Shirt, $20.00

Let the curious know that what's under the kilt is covered by the Official Secrets Act! Complete with red 'ribbon' and the Great Seal (of nowhere in particular)!

Product Description: This 100% cotton, Hanes Authentic Tagless T-Shirt is preshrunk, durable and guaranteed.


The design is on both sides. The 'Great Seal' is a simplified version of the Great Seal of Great Britain. Rob and Enzayer, thanks for the ideas! If you two want the boxers and/or shirt at wholesale, PM me or email me and you can get them. I would give one to you for free, but first we have to see if any of them sell!

Please note that the guarantee is on the shirt, not the effectiveness of the 'Red Tape'!

[AlaskaRoy]

Please send any spare,hairy, butch nordic chicks my way. Thanks!

. . . .
I'd say the same but it's always the hairy, butch nordic chicks that want to lift my kilt.

[binx]

I was playing a gig at a club when while playing a young lady pulled out a little telescoping mirror. Had to be too dark to see anything, but did get a thumb's up. Pretty innovative! I figure if you're a performer that kind of thing's gonna happen. In a pub situation, you're fair game IMHO. No one's going to scold a kilt lifter if everyone's drinking, unless it's your significant other. If you're not prepared to "display your jewels" in that kind of environment, wear trews!

binx

[Ranald]

My view for what it's worth is he's no freind, a real freind would not intentionally try to hurt or offend.
Anyone trying to lift your kilt is acctually asulting you and as such you may defend yourself by any reasonable means. After all women would screem blue murder if a man raised her skirt/dress without her permission.
Not that I'm suggesting you screem like a girl, but it makes me angry that there seems to be one set of rules/morals for women and another set for men.
If it happens to me they better be propared to take a smash in the mouth first ( I don't like surprises).
The key here is ask first ,you maybe surprised.
cheers Richard Duncan Reynolds.

[Tim Walker]

My view for what it's worth is he's no freind, a real freind would not intentionally try to hurt or offend.
Anyone trying to lift your kilt is acctually asulting you and as such you may defend yourself by any reasonable means. After all women would screem blue murder if a man raised her skirt/dress without her permission.
Not that I'm suggesting you screem like a girl, but it makes me angry that there seems to be one set of rules/morals for women and another set for men.
If it happens to me they better be propared to take a smash in the mouth first ( I don't like surprises).
The key here is ask first ,you maybe surprised.
cheers Richard Duncan Reynolds.

Would you be willing to inflict on a woman "a smash in the mouth"? Wouldn't this be disproportionate to the provocation?

[Ranald]

In truth my friend I probably wouldn't hit any woman as I don't think it's right ' but I certainly would threaten to do so.
Please don't misunderstand my message , I said I don't like surprises' and one should be able to defend oneself by any reasonalble means and if while flinging your arm around to get your kilt lowered someone gets hit then so be it.
I ask you this...Would you be willing to fight for your honour and respect?
You have the same rights as everyone else not less because your kilted.

[Mathuna]

I've been wearing kilts for only about two years now, and though I've had several friends (mostly the waitresses of the bars I frequent) tease me with little flips that wouldn't even show if I had boxers on, only twice have I had a "serious" incident.

The first was as I was walking into a restaurant as a couple was walking out. They had the initial "what the..." reaction, then we chatted for a couple of minutes. At one point the woman reached down and started to lift the apron. Her husband actually stopped her before I could, saying "you don't even know this guy!". When she told him "He likes it, that's why he wears a kilt", I had to make it very clear that without an invitation it's beyond rude. It's comparable to my lifting her shirt up without warning. As embarassed as that made her, it got worse when her husband agreed with me and he grabbed her shirt and lifted it. At first she was shocked and fell down grabbing her shirt, but then they were both laughing as she was smacking him all the way to their car.

The second was on St. Patrick's Day, so naturally there was drinking involved. I was shooting pool when a woman I know came up and asked the question. (I thought about giving a "show me yours and I'll show you mine" answer, except this woman was a dancer and I had already seen hers). Because we were in a corner and the crowd was at my back, I just smiled with my hands on my hips as she slowly lifted the apron. I could tell she was just going to lift until she saw underwear, but as I was regimental she kept going until she got a shocked look on her face. Let me tell you, having a very hot stripper look under your kilt and yell "Oh my God! I wasn't expecting THAT!" in a crowded bar has it's ups and downs. The rest of the night I had to be on my guard for uninvited lifters. On the up side, there were a few really good show me/show you moments.

So depending on the circumstance, kilt lifters are one of the blessings/curses we will hopefully have to always live with.

[Jerry]

Would you be willing to inflict on a woman "a smash in the mouth"? Wouldn't this be disproportionate to the provocation?

This isn't kilt related, but it does concern, at least implying physical violence against a female. SEveral years ago, as I pulled off from a green light, a female driver leaving the light opposite me, made a left turn (across my line of traffic), and came within inches of hitting my new truck. I was willing to just go on and continue on my way (no harm no foul?). ut with her vehicle sitting nearly against my truck, The B%$% jumped out and started cursing me in lamguage which would have made any crewman on the destroyer, I was stationed on during the unpleasantness in southeast Asia, blush. When she paused to catch her breath, I simply made the comment, "mam, I don't make it a practice to hit ladies, but it is painfully obvious that you are not a lady, so it wouldn't count." She got back into her car, and I pulled away and left.

[Doc Hudson]

, I simply made the comment, "mam, I don't make it a practice to hit ladies, but it is painfully obvious that you are not a lady, so it wouldn't count." She got back into her car, and I pulled away and left.

Good on ya!!

I've used similar tactics to calm irate women. I've told several that I don't hit ladies, but if you strike me without provocation, I will consider you to be acting like a man and respond accordingly. Generally calms the situation enough for rational conversation or at least we manage to part company without violence.