My first weekend in the kilt

**Phil Wright** · 11th July 05, 02:30 PM

Hate to disappoint you. but despite the occasional English-Scots thing for the last few hundred years, I have had nothing but positive comments English women. I've just got back from a change-ringing training weekend and decided to go kilted for the 21st Anniversary BBQ. No-one mentioned the kilt on the evening, but the following day I had loads of people I had never ever spoken to come up and say that they thought the kilt looked really smart and they were glad I had decided to wear it. I've now orn my kilts often enough to not have to think of them as 'special' and I think the attitude has a lot to do with it. If you can behave normally, and you have nothing to 'prove', then comments are neutral or, thankfully positive. I think the idea of trying to wear it where your wife can see that others actually admire it is the best option! Good Luck with breaking through the zone.
Phil

**Alan H** · 11th July 05, 02:45 PM

I have to say that if she's serious about that....."I'm going to take our son and leave him if he wears that thing"....if she really means it's divorce-time if you wear a kilt....

......then the two of you have issues FAR beyond anything that kilts may or may not cause. It's JUST A PIECE OF CLOTHING. That argument goes both ways, right?

....She says: Why do you have to insult me and degrade yourself and dress like a woman? You know I hate that kilt. Don't you care what I think and how I feel? It's not that important, it's JUST A PECE OF CLOTHING, can't you get rid of it?

....He says: You don't have to go all ballistic over the kilt. I just like to wear it, and it's a guys garment. There's no reason to pitch a fit, It's JUST A PIECE OF CLOTHING.

Because the "just a piece of clothing" argument goes both ways, the whole thing boils down to a simple matter of respect. You, as an adult, have the right to choose what clothes you want to wear. You can exercise that right with some degree of sensitivity towards the woman you are married to, but int he end, you have the right to wear what you want. If you roll over and let her dictate what you can wear....what's next? Would you let her dictate when you go to the bathroom?

You don't have the right to beat her up. You don't have the right to abuse your child. You don't have the right to to just any damn thing you please. But you DO have the right to wear an article of clothing that you like, as long as basic societal norms in terms of decency are respected.

If she simply cannot get that, if she insists that she has the right to enforce her views on what you can wear, then say "OK. If you have the right to forbid me to wear a kilt, then I have the right to forbid you to wear pants. So lose the pants, woman. Skirts and dresses only from now on."

That will go over like a wall of bricks. have an upfront talk about responsibility, respect and marriage. Hopefully she'll get the point. If she doesn't, if she simply cannot accord you the basic respect to let you wear what you want even now and then, well..... honestly? This is hard-*ss*d but honestly....

I recommend a professional counselor.

**Doc Hudson** · 11th July 05, 03:24 PM

As the victim of one surprise divorce demand, (Bank accounts closed, credit cards canceled, and I'm pretty sure my wallet was raided) I also suggest you take steps to protect yourself and your assets.

Truth is, guys generally get the dirty end of the stick in a divorce, if you are headed in that direction, try to protect yourself in advance. It will save lots of pain, anger, frustration, and poverty in the uncertain future.

Seeing a lawyer would be a good idea.

Good Luck and stand firm.

**Archangel** · 11th July 05, 07:44 PM

was telling my supervisor that my wife wanted an option in our new car so we got it. He says, "who wears the pants in your family?". I said, "I'm from Scotland, I don't even understand the question." He just put his head down on his desk saying, "Oh yeah, I've seen you."

Hope it gets resolved peacefully, if not, there's always Blue Cheer t-shirts, a couple of those and she'll be begging you to wear the kilt again.

Maybe she knows the truth. Wore my kilt to the music festival Saturday, wore my shorts on Sunday. On Sunday, no young women came up to me saying they loved my shorts. After Saturday's treatment, I was just crushed.

**chasem** · 11th July 05, 08:25 PM

Originally Posted by Archangel

...there's always Blue Cheer t-shirts...

I'm not familiar with these shirts, got a link?

**Doc Hudson** · 11th July 05, 08:39 PM

Originally Posted by chasem

I'm not familiar with these shirts, got a link?

I don't know if this is what he means, but looks like it would do the job.

http://www.bluecheer.info

**LordDamax** · 11th July 05, 09:35 PM

The fact it is, at its core, a respect issue is very apparent. Another fact is I truly believe she's has a mild personality disorder... she will talk to a friend of hers while I am at work, and just chew me to SHREDS to her. Her friend, also being my friend, and caring about me and our marriage, calls me to warn me of my wife's foul mood and brace myself for a fight when I get home, and I get home, and... "Hi hon... dinner will be ready in a minute"

It boggles the hell outta me. If I did not implicitly trust this mutual friend, I'd say she's a friggin liar, the way the stories differ.

Anyway, got way off topic there. I'm workin on it. Standing up for my right to wear it. Just really waiting on my workmans kilt to come in. I'm either at home playing with my 1 year old son who's always a mess and will quickly stain the kilt, at work where it's not really allowed, or doing construction work where I am not ruining a non work kilt

I wonder if she can tell me the kilt with 4 huge pockets, hammer loop, tape measure hook, made from duc cloth looks like a womans skirt. That'll be the day

**Archangel** · 11th July 05, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by Doc Hudson

I don't know if this is what he means, but looks like it would do the job.

http://www.bluecheer.info

bingo, and get the cds....

you can't win if you play their game, (wife and the other woman)

don't get caught in the games, be yourself. if you want a work kilt and it works for you, go for it, if you think she'll see it as more "masculine" don't get caught in the trap. WW1 trenches were dug with the standard kilt, sportkilt has a farrier using their product shoeing horses. There's a reason people wear coveralls. In my trade it would simply be as impractical to wear a kilt as the woman beside me wearing a skirt instead of coveralls.

will she see the work kilt as feminine? Be ready for it. Yes, in one my early jobs I worked for a woman who had an apron like that, looked like an old soccer pro in a skirt. she could outwork me all day, still terrifies me to think of it.