Kilted at a funeral

[NewKilt]

I'm sorry for your's and your family's loss. Your attire looks very respecful, and you certainly wear it as such.

I'm afraid I'm going to be faced with the decision of whether or not to wear a kilt to a funeral. My father-in-law's health is rapidly deteriorating, and I would be surprised if he survives until the end of the year. Since, this is my wife's father, when the time comes I'll talk to my wife about how she feels about my wearing a kilt to her father's funeral, and will respect her wishes. If my wife is ok with it, then I'll wear the Irish National out of respect for my father-in-law. My wife and her family are have a strong Irish heritage.

Darrell

[Kilted_John]

KCW, sorry to hear about your uncle's passing.

Anyway, the last funeral I attended was my grandmother's funeral in September of 2004. She was 100% Russian. That said, I wore my MacKenzie tartan kilt, with black hose, tartan flashes, a pair of black Doc Martens boots that were polished up, a black shirt and my black leather jacket. No one minded. Not even some Russian friends of my grandmother's. Only got positive comments.

Next time there's a funeral I have to attend, I will do it in the same manner as I did it last time, except, hopefully I'll have a black traditional kilt to wear, instead of relying on the MacKenzie kilt. That way, everything is black, and it won't be as casual as it would be with my black survival UK.
-J

[Verlyn]

When my future son-in-law's grandfather passed around Thanksgiving time, the local bike club organized an honor ride to the funeral in his honor since he was an avid (and national record holder) cyclist. I had heard some folks talking of it being in poor taste for a bunch of lycra clad cyclists to show up at the funeral. Mike (future SIL) showed up at the house at 7 the morning of the funeral with one of his grandfathers bikes and asked if I'd tune it up. He said he wouldn't be doing the honor ride, but wanted to ride from the church to the cemetary on his grandfathers bike. The club met and rode and when we got to the church, his grandmother thanked each and every one of us and said Don would have loved the idea. The Pastor mentioned in his sermon how great a show of love it was that his cycling friends honored him and by the family's request, we were placed directly behind the hearse for the trip to the cemetary. Every single member of the family came and thanked us for the tribute. Not a one thought the garish colors were inappropriate. A funeral should be a celebration of the life of the deceased. We should honor them and if it means not wearing a somber suit, then so be it. I certainly hope that when my time comes, there are kilted gents at the funeral. I think you honored your Uncle to the utmost. Good on ya!

[GMan]

When you are yourself at a funeral or a memorial it is indeed a tribute to the one that is no longer physically with us. You did a great honor by being Kilted as a memory to your Uncle, as he has been part of your life. Good for you!

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Darrell,

My prayers to you and your family. May your FIL get better or pass on in peace and not suffering. Asking your wife her opinion is the best approach.

One point I did not mention was that I had not told my wife that I packed both the kilt and suit. I told her today, and she felt much better that I was cognizant of others feelings and had verified before the service that the kilt would not be a problem.

Verlyn, that is a great tribute! I agree that the service should be a celebration of the life of the person who has passed and not a restricted dress code fashion show (is that too harsh?).

[mexpiper]

I understand the color thing being very garish... at a recent funeral I attended, it was a tradditional Hispanic Catholic Mass, I had my dress pants and a Guyabera (AKA Mexican Wedding Shirt), many were dressed that way. When the family came down the isle following the casket, all her grandchildren and great grandchildren, and great-great grandchildren had bright pink/fushia t-shirts on. It was her favorite color, so to honour her they wore them. Yes, even the men and boys!!

I found it very appropriate, as long as it was done with respect.

I think that when my time comes , i am going to ask everyone to wear a tartan or plaid of some type.... but than again at my church.. when a very liked, loved and respected young man died (16 yo of cancer) , we sang "take me out to the ball park" as his casket left the church, led by the priest.

[Sherry]

RJI,

Was your wife then OK with the kilt?

How loving of your father to give you a gift of understanding during such a sad time.