Too Much Too Soon?

[Ugly Bear]

How far should you take this? To the committee. Since there's already a process in motion here, if you back out now you will be admitting that wearing the kilt was wrong to begin with.

But you must not go further. If the committee gives thumbs-down, abide by that decision for your professional health. If you continue wearing the kilt after that, it WILL be defiance. If you enlist the ACLU or some legal body in this, you may win the right to wear the kilt to work, but you will alienate the entire management structure forever.

I think you've got a good case to take to committee. If the woman supervisor/detractor happens to wear pants to the meeting, that's a bonus: you can cite what Mary Tyler Moore did for women's choices in workplace attire. Stress CHOICE, not fashion. And mention, casually, that of COURSE you wear underwear with the kilt; that's likely a big issue, and the question is so uncomfortable that they may not even ask it.

[Bob C]

It's a simple matter of discrimination. If they allow women to wear skirts, they must allow you to wear a kilt. If they say otherwise, sue the bastards.

Companies need to be reminded, every once in a while, that laws apply to them.

[macgreggor]

When dealing with higher-ups (notice I DIDN'T say superiors) I remember Ben Franklin's advice. If you ask them to do you a favor, make the dress code clear, they cannot take offense. Always thank them for their efforts. Regardless of the outcome.

I am with UglyBear on not forcing the issue further. No sense in winning a battle to lose the war.

BTW, enlist your wife to help with practicing the presentation. Tone, pacing, types of and ammount of supporting evidence. She is the best ally to have on your side!!!

Greg (just dropped more free advice, worth every penny you paid!)

[Jerry]

+I would go only as far as the comittee, But go to the meeting prepared to make a presentation. Approach it from the diversity issue as well as from a heritage standpoint and be prepared with evidence that the kilt is "the most masculine" of garments.

[davedove]

I don't know the level of dress in your office, but I'm sure you can find some pictures among the members here that illustrate a business look while kilted. It may help to be able to show them.

Feel free to use mine if you want:

[ronstew]

My advice changes to "What Ugly Bear said."

[Norbydog]

My situation is different. I actually would choose to not wear a kilt at work.

But for court...that is different. I have thought about it, but I decided not to for two reasons:

1. The administration will start a new policy of only allowing officers to wear uniforms to court. Now that may not seem too bad, but to put on a uniform takes about 3 times as long as a sweater and slacks. And many of the night shifts guys (like myself) want to get up as late as possible, and get back to bed as soon as possible.

2. The people I see at court usually don't have the same maturity and intellect of the general public. So, when I see them again on the street, and I always do, I think that I would be the target of jokes, loud mouths, and drunks. Not that I care, but it is difficult to work a case when you are interrupted about questions about your "dress."

But, I do make it a point to show off new kilts to the office staff on my days off, and even my chief could only say one thing "You look like a real swinger."
I wear a kilt when ever it is appropriate to off duty functions. If I am not on the clock, little they can say.

In your situation, I would say this.....go to the commitee, maybe with a few pictures, and find out why they would say no. Document, document, document. Maybe tape record the session if minutes are not taken. Then, when the time is right, use a snipet to remind them of the decision. Respectfully. Ahear to what they have to say. I would not suggest a lawsuit while you still work there.

A supervisor of mine one told me I'm not "paid to see the big picture." So, when I screw up, even when I really should have known better, I remind him of that statement. Again, respectfully.

[ByDand]

My thoughts echo some already written. You have gone this far so follow through with the meeting. Stay calm and take a few seconds to gather thoughts before answering any questions. Present a good case for wearing the kilt. Explain that it is not a fashion statement, but an acceptable form of attire for men. Remind them that not too long ago it was not acceptable for women to wear slacks in the workplace. Be concise, be cordial and be a good example for the rest of us that may have to follow in your foot steps.

Good luck with your meeting.