Good vibes needed.

**Alan H** · 23rd May 07, 08:13 PM

I almost never read the "Off-Topic" forum so I'm coming to this late.

I'm really glad the news is good. FANTASTIC....I hope she's home soon to keep you in line and wear her pirate wench t-shirt.

It has had to have been a long, hard road, Dread...

**brandycr** · 23rd May 07, 08:33 PM

Soooooo glad to hear things whent well!Couldnt agree more prayer does work.Tell her to hurry and get better !

**Dreadbelly** · 23rd May 07, 08:58 PM

Long hard road indeed.

Started off with joy after finding out she was pregnant. That turned to all kinds of fear when she started hemmoraging and we couldn't figure out why. Turns out that was was a rare type of fybroidal cyst, complete with a pus filled core that literally grew to the point of explosion because of her pregnancy. Resulting burst from cyst caused a miscarriage and very nearly took my wife from me. So much blood. So much bleeding.

And then, bad news on top of bad news. Lost the baby at 12 weeks. At 12 weeks, they look human, ya know? Right around Christmas too. All this bad news. First, it was a tumor. Then it became plural. And then they became large. And then they became serious and dangerous, and the removal, life threatening.

And now this. I guess it over now.

The baby would have been born around the fourth of July. Inspite of feeling overjoyed at keeping my wife, I still feel cheated, angry, and rather bitter to be completely honest. I've watched my wife go from being liquid sunshine to a very broken down and battered soul, nearly broken from the experience. I've hard to sit by and watch helplessly as she went in to some very dark places... And I could do nothing as I watched her change from those experiences. These were monsters that I could not defend her from, shadows I could not pound in to submission with my big hammy hands. Even though I know I haven't, I can not help but feel that I have let her down somehow, even though I know in my heart that there was nothing I could do stop what happened.

My love has been tested. If this is the best that can be mustered to try and cause me to break, it is not enough.

And for all you folks out there that have somebody you love, go and give them a hug. Tonight, I am lonesome. It doesn't mean you have to be.

**Splash_4** · 23rd May 07, 09:12 PM

Dread, buddy, if you need someone to talk to that has gone through this, my wife and I have lost three children due to late term miscarriages. I truly understand what you and your bride are going through. If you wish to chat, just drop me a PM. I will drop what I am doing to call...

The biggest encouragement I can give you is not to treat it as if it did not happen. Continually remind your bride that you love her regardless of the situation. Do not go through what my wife and I did when I shut her out of my life and would not share my hurt and anger. Because of this, she felt even more alone. Let your bride know what your feeling and in turn let her express to you her hurt and fears...

You two continue to be in my prayers.

Mike

**Warhoover** · 23rd May 07, 10:41 PM

Relieved to hear that things went well with the operation!! Our thoughts and prayers are with you both as she starts the healing process! Keep her smiling! Laughing will have to wait until the incisions heal.

**Arlen** · 24th May 07, 12:33 AM

I am so glad for you, Dread. Give her all the best from, I think, all of us at X-Marks. And give that dog another hug, too.

**beowulf67** · 24th May 07, 04:55 AM

Dread,
It good to hear that things went so well with the surgery. Like you said, it will be a long road to full recovery, but she has you there with her to provide strength and love. I can't even begin to imagine all of the emotions you two have been through but always remember that neither of you did anything to cause this, sometimes things just happen. If you start feeling angry, or guilty or blaming yourself, take a moment to look at your wife who is alive and there with you and take joy and comfort in that.

I'll keep you both in my prayers.