Stranger: “So why are you wearing a kilt?”
You: ...."My balls made Parole."

Stranger: “Wow, are you Scottish?
You: …."No, but my blood is."

Stranger: “Is it true what they say?”
You: …."Lets go somewhere private and check."

Stranger: “Can I buy you a drink?”
You: …."No thanks, I'm headed for an AA meeting, would you like to come along?"

Ron