Commercial Break


On a rocky hillside


We see three men, wearing maroon kilts and red shirts, crouched behind some rocks, firing their handguns. They duck behind the rocks to reload, and then look toward the viewers, as if just noticing them.

“Hello,” says the first man, “I’m Mr. Splash.”

“And I’m Mr. BEEDEE,” says the second.

“And I’m Mr. Mender,” says the third.

Bullets bounce off the rock above them. The three men rise up to fire over the rocks again, and then duck back down.

“We’re the Security Force,” says Mr. Splash.

“Of the Airship Saltire,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“Of the League of Moderators,” says Mr. Mender.

“When you’re in the middle of action,” says Mr. Splash.

“You’re often much too busy,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“To eat proper meals,” says Mr. Mender.

“But you’ve got to eat something,” says Mr. Splash.

“To keep up your energy levels,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“Just when you need them most,” says Mr. Mender.

Mr. Splash reaches into a bag at his side and pulls out three wrapped bars. He hands one to each of his companions. He holds up the bar in his hand to show the viewers. Across the bar it is labeled “X Power.”

“That’s why we rely,” says Mr. Splash.

“On the X Power bar,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“To keep us going,” says Mr. Mender.

“It’s blend of all natural ingredients,” says Mr. Splash.

“Provides the perfect combination of nutrients,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“To keep you going when you need it most,” says Mr. Mender.

Each of the men opens their bars and chew on them as more bullets fly overhead. When the bullets stop, they put the wrappers into their pockets and ready their firearms.

“So keep a supply of X Power bars around,” says Mr. Splash.

“For those times when you’re too busy for meals,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“And you’ll be ready for anything,” says Mr. Mender.

Mr. Splash nods to the other two men. They all rise up, shouting out a battle cry, and fire their weapons over the rocks. They finish firing, but no bullets return in response. Their foes have been defeated. The three men return their attention to the viewers.

“The X Power bar,” says Mr. Splash.

“The always handy nutrition bar,” says Mr. BEEDEE.

“From X Marks the Scot,” says Mr. Mender.