I don't tell my wife how to dress and I don't seek her advice on which tartan goes with which shirt. I also steer away from those dreaded questions like:

"Does this make me look fat?"

The only correct answer to a question like this is to have an immediate coughing fit and need to be assisted with medical aid until she forgets the question.

It's like in Hawaii, they are supposed to wear the flower over the _____ ear if they are married and over the _____ ear if they are single? Or a man with an ear-ring in his right ear is prone to _____ and in the left ear if he is prone to _____.