I know exactly what you mean... about kilt police!
When I was recently at the Dunedin Highland games, one of the vendors was selling an off the rack kilt and accessories to a gent. She (the vendor who was not in a kilted skirt) started to spew out all kinds of garbage as to what kilt hose to purchase.
Well I kept my mouth shout because I don't like arguments and drama. I wanted to say something about how sharp it looks when you wear hose that match your shirt.
Another day perhaps..
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