What am I doing wrong?

[Ancienne Alliance]

Six points:

#1 Immediately adopt the kilt as your full time form of dress.
#2 Never look a gift horse in the mouth.
#3 Accept her kind offering with grace and good demeanor!
#4 Your mother-in-law is right – you need not visit her ever again.
#5 This will solve many, many more problems, than you could even begin to think of!
#6 You are a very lucky man!

Excellent !
Now I know what I have to do...