Pay back time?

[Galb]

Yes...yes you should.

[Phogfan86]

I'm glad your mother took charge of this situation for your poor, addled husband. Not.

If it was me, I'd wear the kilt to the reception but not the wedding. That way, you're the bigger person and you're sticking it to her.

And make sure she knows why.

[CDNSushi]

Schadenfreude! Pure, unadulterated schadenfreude.


I love it!




http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schadenfreude

[Panache]

S. M.



I have one question for you:

Are you or your husband in the wedding party?

I completely understand your desire for revenge but as Glen pointed out, "two wrongs don't make a right".

If you are part of the wedding party then you should abide by the wishes of the bride and groom as to your attire during* the ceremony.

That is the right thing to do.

I hope that you and your husband had a very long discussion with your Mother on this subject and resolved this issue. If you haven't you should, what she did was very wrong and you are owed an apology. It would not be unreasonable to ask her to make amends for what she did by honoring your wishes and allowing him to wear a kilted outfit in her wedding.

Now if you aren't in the wedding, I think you and your husband should dress in appropriate Highland Attire (i.e. unless the other guests are wearing a Tux no PC for your husband) and knock 'em dead.

Cheers

Jamie

* Now the reception, as Anne points out below, is another story!

[Pleater]

That actually brought tears to my eyes, for a mother to ruin her daughter's wedding plans like that seems unforgivable - but that is what forgiveness has to have - otherwise it would not require any effort to attain it.

I'd say attend the ceremony in garments your mother would find acceptable - it is after all a solemn occasion with vows made, when the wishes of the bride and groom ought to be held sacrosanct.




However - there is always the reception - maybe a distinctly tartan theme on the tables, with a scottish band, display of Highland dancing outside as the guests arrive, after a well organised diversion to quick change rooms for as many of the guests as can be got in on it.

You get my drift?

Anne the Pleater

[Squeaky McMurdo]

Maybe we'll bring our bagpipes and play Amazing Grace (the only song I can play [well] as of right now) to "honour the bride and groom" Tehehe!

Lol, that's another thing she did...she didn't like the song we picked for our first dance (George Strait-Heaven's Missing an Angel) or any of our songs, so she put in a Bette Midler tape and we ended up doing our first dance to "The Rose"

You know...I don't even know if we're in the wedding party.

Hubby will just wear his kilt to the reception (if we even GO to her wedding, she hasn't even told us when and where it is besides it being sometime in January)

FYI: My mom's fiance LOVED it when me, my hubby, and our daughter showed up in Scottish garb after the Yellowstone Highland Games. He would probably be fine with a tasteful kilt outfit on my hubby.

[GreenDragon]

So my hubby is finally getting a tank (yay!)

My question is this: Should he wear it to my mom's wedding?


Here's the juicy background info:
My hubby had rented a nice kilt outfit for OUR wedding. We got married in Billings, MT so we stayed at my parents' house (my parents were still married then...) We were to be married the next day.

Well, unbeknownst to us, my mother had RETURNED hubby's kilt the day before and EXCHANGED it for a tuxedo and pants. So an hour before we were supposed to get married (on New Year's Eve Day so a lot of places including the rental places were closed) we discovered this and we had to get all our wedding pictures with my new hubby in pants.

When confronted my mother said she, "Didn't think kilts were appropriate wedding attire and didn't want me to to look back on my wedding day with regret."


So now she's getting remarried in January....should he do some pay back?

Heck yeah!

[Barb T]

Personally, I'm with McMurdo. If you want to wear a kilt, wear it for that reason, not because you want to rub your mom's face in it. It's always better to take the moral high ground than to sink to the level of those whose actions you don't like.

So, if he wears a kilt, I think he should do it casually, as if he were completely ignorant of the original insult. None of the "Tad-da! Look what John's wearing! Now, how do you feel?" kind of attitude. If you deliberately detract from your mom's day, I suspect that you will at least feel squirmy about it, if not actually regret it later. And I'd say the same thing about the pipes (much as I love the pipes). If you're going to do it to stick it in her eye, don't. What would you really achieve??

And, if your husband is in the bridal party, it would be *really* wrong to show up in a kilt if he was asked to wear a tux. If he did that, he would be doing the same thing that your mom did, which would make his actions no better than hers were originally.

And, as long as he's not in the wedding party, it doesn't seem to me that it makes any difference if he wears it to both the wedding and the reception or just to the reception.

[Panache]

You know...I don't even know if we're in the wedding party...

FYI: My mom's fiance LOVED it when me, my hubby, and our daughter showed up in Scottish garb after the Yellowstone Highland Games. He would probably be fine with a tasteful kilt outfit on my hubby.

S M,

Wait to see if you are asked to be in the wedding party. If she does then directly tell her how hurt you were that she decided that your husband couldn't wear a kilt to your wedding and that you respectful (and politely) ask her to make amends and allow him to wear one in hers.

Based on what she did to you both on your own wedding I think it would be completely fine to politely decline to be part of her wedding party but wish to attend the wedding.

Cheers

Jamie

[Bob C]

I'm hearing a lot of people telling you to give in to a woman who has proven that she deserves no such consideration. Wear the kilt to the wedding and the reception.

People will walk all over you if you let them. Give Mom a loud and clear declaration that enough is enough.