How do you tell a bad bagpiper to stop playing?

[Splash_4]

How about saying "you have delighted us long enough"?

WOW!!! A quote from a great book "Pride and Prejudice"!

[Ian.MacAllan]

Donald, the budding piper, was holding forth in his favorite pub with far more enthusiasm than expertise. Three times his mates cried out, "Aye, Donal' gi'e 's 'Sco'lan' the Brave'" and three times the aggrieved Donald replied, "Wha'! Ag'in?" and still he didn't understand.

.

[JS Sanders]

<< Donald, the budding piper... >>

Yet again, my flatscreen needs scrubbing.

[thescot]

As a musician (of sorts-I don't make a living doing it), I can say that even constructive criticism can be painful to a novice. I've seen the day when folks endured some pretty bad guitar from me.

On the other hand, inflicting bad music on others is not a nice thing to do.

Personally, I have never told another musician that he/she sucked! But I have distanced myself from the racket.

I think it's probably best to simply run like the very hounds of Hell are on your tail!

[Nighthawk]

You just made my day!!

[Nighthawk]

I don't equate a learning piper with a bad piper. I teach and love to hear new pipers learn. Bad pipers are those that don't belong on the instrument. My comment about not piping in public when I was new was meant to be self-effacing. I apologize for any offence.

You cut me, man. You cut me deep.

Just kidding! I just had to take the jab.

[Detroitpete]

I'm a drummer/percussionist and I've had my share of 'bad nights' and have seen many too. Some, well, they sounded like their drum kit was falling down the stairs. Once, I was doing handdrums/percussion behind a duet of acoustic guitar players and a women playing flute and whistle. During our breaks, a local guy came up and played guitar and sang his own stuff. His playing was good enough but his voice was just terrible.

Think about it--it HAS to be bad if a drummer noticed it ;-)

So the bartender sees the guy going back up to the stage for the second break and calls him over. He tells the troubador that the guys at the bar loved his stuff and want to buy him a round or two.

Long story short--the guy never left the bar after that. I tipped the bartender VERY well.

If ya want a bad musician to stop--buy us a few :-).

If ya want us to sound better, perhaps buying yourself a few may help as well ;-)

[kypnkilt]

This is why I encourage those that are learning or have not played in public to record themselves and listen. I did this and was one of the best learning tools I had besides practice. I did not play in public for quite some time after beginning the pipes....almost 2 years.

I don't openly critique another player. I'll make mental notes of his/her playing and leave it at that. When I was a struggling beginner, I remember negative remarks from either friends or family that actually set me back. Self-confidence takes a big hit when that happens. Learning and playing bagpipes is hard enough as it is and those that might not be ready for "prime-time" and play in public....might get criticized regardless.

Anyway....for those that are learning to play or they are contemplating going "public" here are a few pointers I did to help me out:

1. Record yourself. Listen carefully. Allow yourself to criticize your mistakes and approve upon them. Playing the pipes and listening to yourself play on a recorder are entirely different perspectives.

2. Take small steps toward playing openly. Play an easy tune in front of someone. See if there is a "choke factor". Playing by yourself and playing in front of someone can change how you approach playing and remembering the tune. (I had a big problem with this. Too self-conscience.)

3. Know your pipes' characteristics. Be ready to make many adjustments to tuning in any weather conditions including wind and barometric pressure. Temperature is a big deal. This is why having a good moisture control system is important, especially when it is cold. Do not tune inside and then play outside. If you are going to play outside.....tune outside and vice-versa inside.

4. Find secluded spots such as cemeteries, large parks...middle of nowhere type of places. Get used to being outside. This helps train you for #3.

5. Learn the tunes well. Make them easy tunes. Try to make them short.

6. Keep hands warm if possible. Cold hands make the skin tight and the finger pads will not seal the chanter holes very well.....this where you'll hear alot of squeaking.

These are a few pointers I used and was instructed to do and it helped. I do agree not to say anything. I wouldn't want to be responsible in setting them back.

[Brother Falldown]

It depends.
1.) If he is surronded by people with torches and pitch forks, pick up a stick and join in, if you must.
2.) If he is surrounded by people enjoying themselves, consider yourself an effete snob and move on.
3.) If he is all alone (most likely if he is bad enough to warrant any action on your part) offer some useful pointer to improve him.

[Jack Daw]

You cut me, man. You cut me deep.

Just kidding! I just had to take the jab.

Argh! Meet me at the Clan MacIntyre Assoc. tent or the scotch tasting at the Long's Peak Highland Games come September!