Kilt Etiquette

[KFCarter]

You do need to take pride in what the tartan and kilt means to you and wear it proudly and I don't think you should defer to people who are annoyed by the sight of a kilt for petty reasons. But you shouldn't feel slighted if someone asks you to conform with a certain vision they might have for a special day.

I don't think it ever makes someone less of man, to display courtesy and deference... in fact I think it shows that you're comfortable in your own skin when you can concede gracefully for someone else's sake.

It's okay to break social conventions, especially ones that are arbitrary, you're free to do it. Just exercise judgment when breaking a convention might hurt the feelings of someone you care about and respect. Having said that, I'm doing everything I can do to make it obvious to friends and family that I'm more often than not a kilted person, and that kilts are not just comfortable and different, but they are meaningful to me. I'm hoping to create the idea in their mind that I'll be in kilt by default unless they have a deeply held reason for asking me not to be.

Where you draw the line can also depend a bit on your community. Savannah is fond of its history, has strong Celtic roots and also tolerates its eccentrics. In this town, I would expect to ask when attending a funeral, memorial service or wedding. Those are solemn occasions and the family's vision should be paramount. But I won't ask when invited to black-tie receptions, fund raising dinners and galas, because here you're expected to strut your stuff a bit, and expected to imbibe more than a bit, and there's no way I won't be kilted on those occasions.

All of which is a long-winded way of saying, manners do matter and Makeitstop's nuanced post highlights why it would probably not be a good idea to have a hard and fast rule about kilt-appropriateness, particularly in the U.S. where the sight of a kilt is still regrettably rare for most folks.

[Carolina Kiltman]

. . .I don't think it ever makes someone less of man, to display courtesy and deference...

. . .It's okay to break social conventions, especially ones that are arbitrary, you're free to do it. Just exercise judgment when breaking a convention might hurt the feelings of someone you care about and respect.

. . . manners do matter and Makeitstop's nuanced post highlights why it would probably not be a good idea to have a hard and fast rule about kilt-appropriateness, particularly in the U.S. where the sight of a kilt is still regrettably rare for most folks.

I just wanted to add my tuppence here. One of my pet peeves is people who behave as if all social customs are "arbitrary and useless" and delight in being offensive in language, dress and general demeanour. It is this "proper behaviour" in the "market-place" that defines civilized society, and enables us to get along without too much violence. (There is far too much of that without trying to add more!)

[herminator]

I wear only kilts exept at work, where I wear white trousers - I´m a nurse!

So at funerals I wear my Ben Dubh kilt, a black shadow tartan. The funerals I go to are mostly people who lived in the greiatric home I work in (luckily!) and my dress code is known there!

I have not been to any wedding since I wear kilts, but I simply don´t have anything else I can dress up ...