Trying to Convince.

**IsaacM** · 28th October 09, 04:50 PM

Well, coming soon is my High School's Fall Formal Dance. I, of course, want to wear my kilt. I do not want to just simply walk in kilted, only to be turned away. I want to make sure the the school is OK with it first.

My main dilemma is how to go about this. Kilts kind of got in a bad light (at least to the Principal and others) a few years ago when some Seniors decided to be smart. They got some plaid cloth from Wal-Mart and had their grandma make them some kilts. They wore them to school to make a point that, even though our school only allowed trousers and long skirts, several girls were getting away with wearing short skirts. They were immediately forced to change out of them or go home.

So my two ideas would be to A. Write the principal a letter explaining my reasoning for wanting to wear a kilt and that the kilt is not just a garment to be silly in. Or B. Go up to him and ask him in person, and hope that he will allow me to explain a little bit before just saying no. (And pray that he is either OK with it or that I am good enough with my words to convince him)

Any thoughts or advice?

I know it's a rather odd question, but I figure I would ask the experts.

Thanks.

**piperdbh** · 28th October 09, 04:58 PM

As a high school teacher, first let me applaud you for daring to be different.

Now, about your principal. It might help to get dressed up (at home) just as you're planning to dress for the dance, have someone take a picture of you, and then take that with you when you approach the principal. That way, he/she can see what you're talking about, you won't have to take up a whole lot of time explaining things, and he/she will realize that you mean business and you're not just some punk trying to be silly, as it sounds like the other students you mentioned were doing. I don't know how your school schedule operates, but there's probably a time that's a little less busy than other times. I'd suggest before the school day starts. You might also want to practice what you're going to say. It never hurts to be ready.

I hope this helps. Keep us posted!

**bricelythgoe** · 28th October 09, 05:39 PM

Originally Posted by piperdbh

As a high school teacher, first let me applaud you for daring to be different.

Now, about your principal. It might help to get dressed up (at home) just as you're planning to dress for the dance, have someone take a picture of you, and then take that with you when you approach the principal. That way, he/she can see what you're talking about, you won't have to take up a whole lot of time explaining things, and he/she will realize that you mean business and you're not just some punk trying to be silly, as it sounds like the other students you mentioned were doing. I don't know how your school schedule operates, but there's probably a time that's a little less busy than other times. I'd suggest before the school day starts. You might also want to practice what you're going to say. It never hurts to be ready.

I hope this helps. Keep us posted!

Coming from another teacher, I would second this idea. Good Luck!

Brice

**Nighthawk** · 28th October 09, 05:43 PM

It may also help to know your state's cultural discrimination laws. Remember- just because you're a student doesn't mean you don't have the same civil rights as everyone else. Ask your principal what he would do if a black student wanted to wear African formalwear, as well. Would he turn that student away? Remember that you have the same cultural and religious rights as everyone else regardless of your age or ethnic origin. That arguement is actually how I got the right to wear the kilt to my workplace- that and I agreed to dress the rest of me up a little more than I already did. Give a little, get a little.

Oh yeah- and you teachers- you all rock!! I need to get my lazy butt back into school and finish my degree... Both my parents are teachers, and I would love to follow in their footsteps.

**Paul** · 28th October 09, 05:43 PM

I like Piperdbh's idea... he might have preconceptions about what a kilt outfit looks like and if you're going in a prince Charlie or other formal jacket with a tie or bowtie it should erase these in his mind. He'll be able to see how smart you'll look and how relevant it will be to the dress code.

**Panache** · 28th October 09, 06:02 PM

I like piperdbh's suggestion a lot.

I would though recommend that instead of just approaching your principal before, after, or between classes you schedule an appointment with him/her for 15 minutes concerning the dress code of the Fall Formal Dance.

Then plan your presentation, get photos of the outfit you wish to wear, bring your kilt (don't wear it) to show that you are talking about real highland attire.

Practice your presentation to your parent/parents if you can and see if you can get their support.

It goes without saying that the more respect you show the principal and the better you are at expressing what and why you wish to wear to the dance the better your chances are of having an agreement.

If you have any Scottish blood connections then by all means make sure to mention your desire to express and honor your heritage.

If your principal has any knowledge of kilts you can help your case a lot by bringing up and answering these two concerns yourself first

First, that you will certainly not be wearing a sgian dubh as part of your formal attire

Second, that despite tradition you will certainly be wearing dark colored underwear in case of any foolishness on the part of rowdy classmates

I wish you luck!

Cheers

Jamie :ootd:

**ccga3359** · 28th October 09, 06:21 PM

Great advice, go into the meeting armed to the teeth, that is armed with knowledge and respect of all things kilt. If you can show strong Scottish connection so much the better. If not don't fret, find another tact. Showing your intention to be respectful of your kilt and others around you (under garments) and school rules will go a long way. Don't show aggression should the conversation not go your way, be courteous and respectful of any decision. Even a "No" answer could change if met this way. If your principal needs to consider it, allow it. A mature attitude will but you more on an even station with this person.

**KD Burke** · 28th October 09, 06:31 PM

As someone who, more or less, makes his living from preparing and presenting cogent arguments, I'd have to agree to the above. A couple of suggestions:

1. Outline your argument. Make three valid, sincere points. (It's sort of traditional. Less and you seem unprepared, more and you tend to lose interest.)

2. Practice. Practice again. Get some critique from a knowledgeable elder, perhaps a sympathetic school counselor. Make corrections and practice.

3. Once, you are prepared, stop practicing, relax. Get a good night's sleep. Go into the meeting confident.

Good luck to you!

**Wild Macrae** · 28th October 09, 06:53 PM

I agree with the advice given so far. Be prepared and be courteous. I don't see why your principal would deny your request based on principle (see what I did there), but understand that your principal may ask you not to wear your kilt as it could cause a disturbance among your less mature classmates. Some of your peers may get the impression that this opens the door for them to wear whatever they want whenever they want without understanding the true significance and meaning of your garb.

**CDNSushi** · 28th October 09, 08:50 PM

In addition to this, I might also suggest that if the principal has any misgivings, you may want to direct him HERE -- to the XMTS forum --give him the URL. Then he can see that there is a strong community of kilt wearers who are respectable, responsible people, and if he has any questions or concerns, it would be very easy for him to sign up and ask the rabble. We would be glad to answer any such queries.