On changing one's name

[piperdbh]

You already see how much paperwork will be involved in changing your name. Since you're doing it as a tribute to the family who raised you, and whom you'd like to emulate, and not as a slap to your father, then I'd say go ahead, and let us know how it all turns out.

[fudgeman]

Your reasons are sound. You have no children to complicate things. Your wife supports you. Do it!!

[Friday]

I have always been of the opinion that you only own one thing in life, and that is your name. Everything else, comes and goes. If your name is not you change it to the one that represents you. Go for it.

[MacMillan of Rathdown]

You are who you are. I can see no reason why you shouldn't take your Mother's name if that's what you want to do. There is nothing out of the ordinary in it and, as a matter of fact, it regularly happens all of the time. Author Anne McCaffery has two sons; the eldest bears his father's surname, the youngest Anne's maiden name in honour of her father.

Once you do change your name you will need a lawyer to sort out all sorts of legal stuff (credit ratings, passports, drivers licenses, mortgages, vehicle registration, etc.) as well as to notify, in writing, all of your friends that you have taken a new name. Post 9-11 the process isn't as simple as it once was. Expect the "change over" process to cost something in the neighborhood of $2,000 by the time every little detail is taken care of.

I would suggest that you talk it over with your lawyer before a final decision is made; you might also want to consider the option of adding your Mother's maiden name ahead of your family name either with, or without the hyphen, as this might simplify things.

[Macman]

I don't think it's weird for a man to change his name. Your reasons are sound and valid, and you've obviously thought about it for a long time. I'll bet you'll feel happy once you do it.

[DesertCeltic]

I would do it. You are obviously much more connected with your mother's side of the family and on top of that it seems an honorable thing in regards to showing how much you appreciate her and her family in raising you.

[mrtackytn]

I took my wife's family name and hyphenated it my family surname after we married.
She was the younger of two sisters, and the family name would end with her. Also,
her father died of cancer when she was only nine, so it was also a way of honoring
the father-in-law that I never had. Go for it !!

[turpin]

You have thought it through and you want to do it for honorable reasons and not to thumb your nose at your father. As long as you are willing to take care of all the associated administrivia, You should not hesitate.

[bigdad1]

I find your story and your reasons to be compelling, well thought out and very convincing. A mans name is all he carries with him that is his and his alone. Feeling as you do about your father and your mothers family I feel you should take the steps and do the deed. I know my natural father left when I was about 2 or 3 (60 years ago)and I never saw him again. If I had a situation like yours with a mothers family I cared for and whose name I respected I would like to think I would have done as you propose. Best wishes on making your decision and may it all go swimmingly.

[NewGuise]

I would suggest that you talk it over with your lawyer before a final decision is made; you might also want to consider the option of adding your Mother's maiden name ahead of your family name either with, or without the hyphen, as this might simplify things.

I'll just note that I did exactly that, without any hyphen, in order to acknowledge my mother and her side of the family along with my father and his side. And that was very, very easy to do ... although some forms are set up to recognize only one "middle" name or initial at most, in which case I end up going with first name and (my father's) surname - that is the one downside, but perhaps a notable one in your situation.