Beard Advice

[fhpdo]

I just shaved mine down to old school "mutton chops" I like it but the wife hates them. She says I look like a walrus. I'll keep it this way a little while then probably go back to just the mustachew for a bit. I change beard styles pretty often.

[Mike_Oettle]

Revisiting this thread I came across Piper’s reference to a cigarette accident, which called to mind a story I read about a youngster on a London railway station, waiting for a train to take him to a Territorial Army camp.
While having a draw on a cigarette, he set fire to his beard. He and his mate frantically beat at the flames, averting complete disaster but removing almost all of the beard.
A uniformed officer rushed up to see if he could help, but was reassured to see that the fire was out and the private was virtually shaved. He remarked: “Amazing. Instant rifleman!”

fhpdo mentioned muttonchops. Before I grew my beard I was working for an employer who did not permit beards. But I pushed the limits of his rules by gradually growing my sideburns longer and longer. Every now and then I would be told to shave them off.
My mother’s friend referred to the muttonchops I occasionally sported as “louse ladders”!
Some years later I found a picture of myself with them, and had to admit that she wasn’t far off.
Anyway, after I quit that particular job I got a position in the civil service. The day I started work I stopped shaving. Barring the military exceptions mentioned above, I have not shaved since.

In closing, Tobus wrote: “The ‘permanent stubble’ look may be in fashion because it makes men look rugged without making them look like cavemen (according to the fashionistas, anyway), but I personally think it's a travesty.”
Dead right, Tobus. I do think these chaps with permanent stubble look like cavemen!
Regards,
Mike

[ohiopiper]

Like Piper I once had an accident with a lighter. I was still in the Navy and on board the U.S.S. Carl Vinson (CVN-70), an aircraft carrier. Well, I was an aircraft mechanic, so what better place to be, eh?

Anyhow, I smoked a pipe then so nobody would ask to bum a cigarrette from me. On the smoking sponson the wind was pretty brisk and i was hunkered over my lighter and puffing away to get lit. Suddenly the wind just stopped. The flame went straight upward, the smell of burning hair filled my nostrils and half my moustache was history.

Then there was the "Shaver Saver" incident. Rather lengthy but amusing tale of three generations of (temporarily) hairless men in my family.

My Grandmother used to cut our hair and had a set of electric clippers for the job. She was cutting mine and my Dads hair and commented that the clippers were getting clogged up with bits of hair. Along comes my Grandfather who says he has just the thing. It is called "Shaver Saver" and cleans hair from electric razors. To use, turn on the razor and spray the product onto the cutting head.

Notice there is no mention of directions for use on clippers.

We three generation of usually smart men gather 'round. One to hold the clippers, one to operate the spray can, and me just because i was being nosey. "Squirt" goes the can. "Whoosh" goes the flame extending from can to clippers, engulfing my beard, my Grandfathers moustache and all three sets eyebrows.

Next time you turn on your hair clippers, pay attention to the small spark that can be seen just below the cutting blades. THIS is why there are no instructions for use on hair clippers, only electric razors WHICH HAVE NO EXPOSED SPARK TO SET THE BLASTED STUFF ON FIRE!

Feel free to laugh hysterically. everyone else did. Most stopped after our hair grew back.

[Mike_Oettle]

[tooltruckguy]

I never use trimmers on my beard. I hit it with a brick from the outside and chew off the hairs on the inside!

[Ryan Ross]

I never use trimmers on my beard. I hit it with a brick from the outside and chew off the hairs on the inside!

Hah- Never heard that one before. I like it.

Personally, I just hit it with the electric trimmer once or twice a week(yes, it grows that fast, and I like a short, tidy beard), and shave around the edges a few times a week. All that said, my beard is about as standard as they come- the "Short Full Beard", I believe the beard afficionados would call it(see angry-looking picture at bottom).

As for what you do with your own beard- I feel like that's every man's personal choice. Personally, I like to stick with something classic. Others might want to get inventive, which is just as good.

Happy bearding!

[Urchurdan]

Some great pics, I like mutton chops, but am currently sporting a full beard, I also dislike the permanent stubble look, looks sloppy..

With Mutton chops


With full beard

[Ryan Ross]

Very nice! I love the (happy)mutton chops.

I went crazy with the chops one Halloween, a few years ago. Forgive the funny hat, but that was before my bonnet making days...

[Old Hippie]

I was still in the Navy and on board the U.S.S. Carl Vinson (CVN-70), an aircraft carrier.

When was that? My brother was a chaplain on the Vinson, if I remember correctly.

He's another pipe smoker, as I used to be until I got tired of singed eyebrows every time my lighter would belch.

:ootd:

[Kiltboy]

Next time you turn on your hair clippers, pay attention to the small spark that can be seen just below the cutting blades. THIS is why there are no instructions for use on hair clippers, only electric razors WHICH HAVE NO EXPOSED SPARK TO SET THE BLASTED STUFF ON FIRE!.

My dad, the barber, had a similar experience years ago with a sales person pushing his cleaning/lubricating aerosol spray. Fortunately, when tested, it was pointed away from everyone. One spray turned it into a small flame thrower. Needless to say, he didn't buy the cleaner. And yours truly was drafted to help clean the mess later that evening.