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  1. #21
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    15th December 10
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    jonesing explained

    You guys are just plain funny. Of course I didn't check the FAQ. Who knew? Although having been duly welcome by Mr. Ashton by a fine letter that is quite explicit about the FAQ... I get it! I really do! And I will be one of the first guys to say, "Hey, did you click on the FAQ link, 'cause there really is one and it has the answers to most of the questions about life, the universe and everything". But maybe just because I'm stricken with a bad case of "jonesing" (now that I have been the recipient great description and lived experience) my neural networks can't process FAQ's fast enough in order to arrive at the rather harsh conclusion that I am in a sorry state of waiting and can only glean some sense of comfort knowing that someday my new kilt will arrive...AND, that you have all been there before me and stand therefore in unwavering solidarity with the new guy on the block who now has a whole new appreciation for the term and for the lads who have struggled throughout history as they wait and wait until the day when they can don the next kilt. So, as I wait I "jones". And so it goes and continues....
    lr

  2. #22
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    7th July 09
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    Jeff

    Now that was a marvelous dissertation on JONESING
    Shoot straight you bastards. Don't make a mess of it. Harry (Breaker) Harbord Morant - Bushveldt Carbineers

  3. #23
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    Thank you, Downunder! Just trying to get a grip on the whole thing. I wonder, what makes owning a kilt such an "addicting" thing? Is it about heritage, a closer connection with one's DNA, looking good...? What is it about kilt ordering and ownership that creates such a "jones"?

  4. #24
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    7th February 11
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    For me it is not just kilts and kilt accessories that cause me to jones everything i order causes me to jones. I think it may be a by product of our instant gratification society. We can get almost anything now almost immediately so i think that is where it comes from for me.

  5. #25
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    Yes, there is merit in "slow kilting" isn't there? The wait and the anticipation is as much a part of the whole process as the arrival. It's a good antidote to the perils of instant gratification.

  6. #26
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    13th April 09
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    LOL, this is a beautiful piece of literary work, Jeff! Please let it be noted that wives can also experience a "jones" on their husband's (or SO's) behalf!

    Melissa

    Quote Originally Posted by ForresterModern View Post
    The thing about "jonesing" is that there are a myriad of varieties of it----a regular jones is when you order a kilt and wait for its arrival, but it can be double trouble as it starts when you order it, may be amplified when you find out it will not ship immediately (most have to be custom made), amplified again when the maker sends you that email notifying you it has been shipped only made worse by the cruelty of including a shipping tracking code so that you may even further be tormented by checking its tracking status every five minutes as you electronically watch your next "fix" wend its way across an ocean and then cross-country, aching in your belly with each new updated stop along the way until, of course while you are at work, notification is made online that an "attempted" delivery was made but not consummated because a signature was required and nobody was home, so the hole in your belly has to gape even further for another 24 hours as you sign the pink delivery slip snd stick it back on your front door for the delivery service to leave it on your doorstep today (all the while hoping the slip does not blow off the door in the wind), so you tape it there with about 4 extra pieces of tape, then you have to go to work while salt is poured on your open gaping abdominal wound knowing that you have 9 hours til you get home to the soon to be waiting package. You are totally worthless at work as you cannot quit checking the tracking site until you see its status updated to "delivered", then spend the last few hours at work walking around like you have to pee really badly as you are extremely excited like a kid in a toy store, die another death as you have to stop for groceries or gas on the way home, another agonizing delay, then of course traffic is horrible and the lights are all against you, then you are finally home and throw down your work gear and race to the front door like a kid on xmas morning to find a package, the holy grail of packages, there, a small relief as the excruciating pain takes over when you cannot focus on how to most quickly open the box (why did they have to use so much tape, d@%$ it) practically chewing your way into the package like a starving dog, then another small touch of relief when you see it for the first time, see it and touch it and hold it. You race to your bedroom to drop trou' (aahhh crap, forgot to take off my shoes and can't get my pant legs over them!), then finally unwrap and strap that beauty around your waist with a short sigh of relief AAAAHHHHHH that feels so GOOOOD. What? What are those white zig zag threads keeping my pleats from swishing? BASTING STITCHES which take another 5-15 minutes to remove because your hands are now shaking so much (I don't care what they say it is never one snip and the whole thread comes out with one pull!). Then finally you can again strap on that new baby and twirl in front of the mirror to watch the pleats move. You grab the camera and --oh no, the wife is not home to take pictures! Have to post on xmarks that I got my new kilt but must have pictures so you shoot some in the bathroom mirror wearing short navy blue dress sockes and your penny loafers, without a proper kilt belt or pin, but can't qite get that pleat shot because your head doesn't spin around 360 degrees like a hoot owl's. So you grab some proper kilt hose, a kilt belt, sporran and strap, and some appropriate shoes (the best you have at the moment, they will have to do), WHERE ARE MY FLASHES, and, GOD this shirt looks terrible with the tartan---have to change, but into what? Where is that tatersall buttondown anyway. Oh good honey is home-----here dear is the camera, oh welcome home kiss kiss, here shoot some pictures of me in my new kilt SO I CAN POST THEM ON XMARKS because without pictures it didn't happen, d@&* the batteries are dead, must find more batteries.........
    Jeff

  7. #27
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    For those of us who REALLY need help--the BEST Jones, is the long, slow, drawn out, painful anticipation of a handmade tank or jacket. For me, it's taking all the time needed for measuring, discussing, re-measuring, re-discussing and finally placing the order with someone like Matt Newsome and saying, "yep--this Jones is REALLY gonna hurt, but it will be SO worth it!". Months later, you stand there with a handful of a custom made garment of tartan while in a state of supreme glee.

    I do not advise many of these long-slow-painful Joneses back to back. One must pace themselves with the occasional 'quick fix' from Jerry at Stillwater and the medium length, yet still pleasingly tortuous Jones one can receive whilst waiting for Vmac to do her magic on a jacket conversion for you.

    Oh the pain...

    Oh the glory!
    [I][B]Ad fontes[/B][/I]

  8. #28
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    Yes, I am jonesing for a Matt Newsome custom weave. I get it Detroitpete! Well said. I figure I'm half way through the jonesing. But like I said earlier, the slow kilt is well worth the heart and soul of the whole process!

  9. #29
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    Yes Forrester Modern's literary work is brilliant!

    I'm going through a big-time Bagpipe Jones at the moment.

    I aquired an approximately 130-year-old set of pipes rather cheaply on Ebay.

    From a local seller, so I was able to pick them up right away. So far, no Jones.

    But these pipes look their age and needed some TLC. I was able to do most of the work myself but one part needs a professional repair done and last week I shipped that part off to a pipemaker in Canada.

    So here I am, with a wonderful old bagpipe sitting around, complete save for one crucial part, and therefore unplayable. That's Bagpipe Jones.

    (Anyone remember the song Basketball Jones?)

  10. #30
    Mike_Oettle's Avatar
    Mike_Oettle is offline Oops, it seems this member needs to update their email address
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    Well, I am pleased to report that my jones is over. My kilt arrived on Friday by courier, and the black kilt hose I had ordered from another supplier arrived the same day.
    I still have to arrange a sporran, but I am wearing a borrowed sporran as I sit at work in my Mighty Men kilt, tie and flashes (worn with a black shirt and the black kilt hose).
    Only problem is the photographic side. My wife was not interested in taking pictures, and I have still not located my download cable. But there is a record, and it will be posted.
    Regards,
    Mike
    The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life.
    [Proverbs 14:27]

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