Too Much Too Soon?

[Southern Breeze]

I wear the kilt at work with no problems. Here's a good thread to check out.

http://www.xmarksthescot.com/forum/s...highlight=work

[ronstew]

I think that your wife is on the right track. Being right would be a poor reward for worsening your relationship with your superiors. You surely won't get fired over this, but there may be other repercussions - some subtle, some not. You have an opportunity to show yourself to be a team player, but the opportunity won't last long.

Too much, too soon. I recommend backing off. Letting the situation cool for a while (like maybe a year or until the boss who originally said "no" is no longer your boss) then try again.

That's my advice. You can assess its worth for yourself.

[NewKilt]

I think Phil offers some very sound advice in his post. I also think, as was mentioned, having some info on companies that allow the kilt to be worn is a good idea. You might also bring some pictures of yourself kilted.

Think of this as an opportunity to sell yourself, and to sell the wearing of the kilt. If you handle yourself well, you will gain the committee's respect.

Darrell

[KiltedKnight]

#1 question to ask: are the women allowed to wear pants? If the answer is yes, then they cannot forbid you from wearing a kilt. What is good for the goose, is good for the gander.

I would review the dress code of the compnay and if it says anywhere that dresses, skirts or slacks, (pants, trousers, etc.,) are permitted for female employees I think they'll back down immediately on a discrimination threat. Where would they stand if they permitted anything a female woud care to wear and would not permit a man to wear a man's garment? I doubt they could even modify their dress code under those conditions legally.

Chris. :confused:

[jjoseph]

#1 question to ask: are the women allowed to wear pants? If the answer is yes, then they cannot forbid you from wearing a kilt. What is good for the goose, is good for the gander.

Yes, they can. I'm a supervisor and responsible for hiring and firing and I sit on one of those committees. Dress codes promote the company's image, not yours. They often demand a measure of uniformity, hence the word uniform for those who wear them. And commitees like that are most often to act as conflict resolution mediators.... getting both sides to productively tell their side of an issue. Most often the actual decision is left in the hands of the supervisor or manager, but if the committee makes a decision, be prepared to live with it unless you decide to put your job on the table as a bargaining chip.

On the other hand, if you work in an environment where wearing a kilt poses no health / accident risks and won't project an unwanted image of the company, you have every right to ask for accomodation. The issue of women being able to wear trousers may or may not carry weight depending on how your job interfaces with the public since it is the perception of the company which you create as their representative which is paramount, not a woman's nor your right to wear a particular item. The possible exception to this would be attire required by a religious belief, something which touches a matter of conscience.

Like any ruling of law or policy, it is less about justice or fairness and more about the group's or society's approach to resolving conflict. There is an understood social contract that individuals will abide the group's decisions (be they made by judge, jury, committee, or manager).

Pick your battle well. And remember, that if they say no, and it's really important to you, there really are other jobs out there. Find one with boundaries where you will be happy. Companies losing good people is actually one of the things which affects longterm change.... just not in time for those who are its spearhead.

Best wishes and good luck.

[ckelly327]

First - there is a committee set up to hear issues like this, so I'm guessing you're not the first to find yourself at odds with a supervisor.

Second - Remember it's as much about how you say something as what you say. As long as you discuss "your side" of the issue clearly, calmly, and rationally there is little for them to find fault with. You might point out the lack of a dress code regulation regarding kilts.

I agree completely here. Since you've already worn a kilt on at least one occasion then your other supervisors have seen a glimpse of any work related issues. Hopefully some of them will be part of the review committee and you can ask them directly in front of the offended person, "Did my wearing a kilt have any effect on the job I did that day?" Hopefully the answer comes back, No, and you'll get some added support. Stay calm and cool and take your time to think out a well reasoned answer before answering any questions. I also agree with bringing some pictures instead of a live demonstration.

Bring a good attitude and don't let anything get confrontational and you'll do fine.

[Ugly Bear]

How far should you take this? To the committee. Since there's already a process in motion here, if you back out now you will be admitting that wearing the kilt was wrong to begin with.

But you must not go further. If the committee gives thumbs-down, abide by that decision for your professional health. If you continue wearing the kilt after that, it WILL be defiance. If you enlist the ACLU or some legal body in this, you may win the right to wear the kilt to work, but you will alienate the entire management structure forever.

I think you've got a good case to take to committee. If the woman supervisor/detractor happens to wear pants to the meeting, that's a bonus: you can cite what Mary Tyler Moore did for women's choices in workplace attire. Stress CHOICE, not fashion. And mention, casually, that of COURSE you wear underwear with the kilt; that's likely a big issue, and the question is so uncomfortable that they may not even ask it.

[Bob C]

It's a simple matter of discrimination. If they allow women to wear skirts, they must allow you to wear a kilt. If they say otherwise, sue the bastards.

Companies need to be reminded, every once in a while, that laws apply to them.

[macgreggor]

When dealing with higher-ups (notice I DIDN'T say superiors) I remember Ben Franklin's advice. If you ask them to do you a favor, make the dress code clear, they cannot take offense. Always thank them for their efforts. Regardless of the outcome.

I am with UglyBear on not forcing the issue further. No sense in winning a battle to lose the war.

BTW, enlist your wife to help with practicing the presentation. Tone, pacing, types of and ammount of supporting evidence. She is the best ally to have on your side!!!

Greg (just dropped more free advice, worth every penny you paid!)

[Jerry]

+I would go only as far as the comittee, But go to the meeting prepared to make a presentation. Approach it from the diversity issue as well as from a heritage standpoint and be prepared with evidence that the kilt is "the most masculine" of garments.