What do I say to my Dad?

[Riverkilt]

Have been interested in my family genealogy since a third grade class project...have been bursts of energy from time to time working on it. The Internet brought connections with distant cousins and lots of information sharing. No one in my immediate family cared. Some knowing of my interest would send me bits and pieces. My little brother gave me an old Family Tree Maker software that he got somewhere.

What I chose to do was use that to at least fill out all the branches of the family tree that I knew. Then I printed up about 30 some copies of it and mailed it off to every relative - mostly cousins. But now, all that information was so widely spread that some of it should survive for another generation's genealogy addict to find.

So, that's an option for you. Centralize the information you have so far then print it up and distribute it - regardless of your father's opinion.

Most folks think we genealogy addicts are a bit "off." Just the way it is.

Ron

[Nick the DSM]

if he doesn't want to then don't make him. just let yourself be the family historian.

[Ian.MacAllan]

Then there are health aspects to family history. Knowing that a particular condition has occured frequently in your family can encourage early detection and effective treatment.

I am at least the third generation of males in my family to have a particular vision difficulty; earlier records are not available. In my case it was identified only in my tenth year, too late to be treated effectively. Knowing this history, I had my son tested and treated when he was six, and within two years he had (and retains) normal vision.


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[macwilkin]

You have nailed it. I would have to say that most Americans don't care about where their came from,

I don't want to turn this thread into a political debate, but most people move to America to become American. They don't really care about who they are and where they are from. Once they are assimilated to the American collective, they feel that resistance is futile.

I am glad that you took an interest in your roots. Last names should be more than just an identification. It should have meaning and history. Many people have lost their ethnic identities and become drones.

Sorry, Raph, but you're wrong on your second point. A number of immigrants to the USA (and Canada for that matter) have held on to ties to the old world as well as being residents of the New. I discuss this in my history classes I teach; matter of fact, I'll be taking my Ozarks history class to a church that was started by German immigrants in the 19th century and still has a lot German heritage connected with it.

For many immigrants, maintaining ties to the old country was a safety valve in a country where the "native Americans" wanted nothing to do with them.

Regards,

Todd

[Deil the Yin]

Well, for starters, you can let him think what he wants. It's unlikely that you'll change his opinion much. But you can let him know what you think, and if you think it's important to know your heritage in order to know yourself better, then just say so. No need to convert him into anything that he doesn't want to be. Put it on the table. If he picks it up, great, but if he doesn't, it hasn't changed a thing.

Good luck.
Rex.

I concur wholeheartedly.

You have nailed it. I would have to say that most Americans don't care about where their came from,

I don't want to turn this thread into a political debate, but most people move to America to become American. They don't really care about who they are and where they are from. Once they are assimilated to the American collective, they feel that resistance is futile.

I am glad that you took an interest in your roots. Last names should be more than just an identification. It should have meaning and history. Many people have lost their ethnic identities and become drones.

This may be true of some nationalities, but from all that I have read/studied, many of the Scots and other settlers from the Celtic fringe came to America to try and preserve their way of life that was being destroyed by the industrial revolution. You can see this in the South especially where our culture has been predominantly defined by these immigrants from the Celtic fringe and thus we have been very slow/opposed making social changes as opposed to other parts of the continent. Thus just as, for example, the Scottish Highlanders were thought of by lowlanders and the English as backward or savage etc, so Southerners are generally negatively stereotyped by the rest of the country...

[Phogfan86]

Sorry, Raph, but you're wrong on your second point. A number of immigrants to the USA (and Canada for that matter) have held on to ties to the old world as well as being residents of the New. I discuss this in my history classes I teach; matter of fact, I'll be taking my Ozarks history class to a church that was started by German immigrants in the 19th century and still has a lot German heritage connected with it...For many immigrants, maintaining ties to the old country was a safety valve in a country where the "native Americans" wanted nothing to do with them.

But as history teacher, I think you'd agree that this is a relatively new phenomena. From my reading -- albeit limited -- there were immigrants for a long time -- I'd guess post-Civil War til after WWII -- whose main objective was to get off the boat, learn English, get a job and assimilate as quickly as possible.

I'm into my heritage because, as a country, the US is in its adolescence. We're building our own history; we're still working on it. I think a lot of people crave belonging to something old, something bigger than they are. A lot don't.

My wife doesn't get my obsession, either, and all she knows about her own heritage -- Norski -- is that if we (Scots) built it, they (Vikings) either stole it, burned it or tore it down. Beyond that, she's really not interested.

[sharpdressedscot]

I say, do what you want to do, but don't push it to your dad. He might not enjoy celebrating (for the lack of a better word right now) ancestry, but I think he can support you if you really needed it.

My father isn't very interested in anything related to our family history, however, my mother is.

[macwilkin]

But as history teacher, I think you'd agree that this is a relatively new phenomena. From my reading -- albeit limited -- there were immigrants for a long time -- I'd guess post-Civil War til after WWII -- whose main objective was to get off the boat, learn English, get a job and assimilate as quickly as possible.

I'm into my heritage because, as a country, the US is in its adolescence. We're building our own history; we're still working on it. I think a lot of people crave belonging to something old, something bigger than they are. A lot don't.

My wife doesn't get my obsession, either, and all she knows about her own heritage -- Norski -- is that if we (Scots) built it, they (Vikings) either stole it, burned it or tore it down. Beyond that, she's really not interested.

On the contrary -- in the 19th century, you'll find plenty of examples of immigrants retaining ties to the auld country, from language to religion to newspapers to fraternal organisations, not to mention the "ethnic" regiments of the Union and Confederate armies during the Civil War. Not everyone automatically gave up their culture and assimilated.

Just as a few examples, think of a local "ethnic" church (Norwegian & German Lutherans, Irish/Italian/Polish Catholics), the Sons of Norway, the Ancient Order of Hibernians and the St. Andrew's Society for example.

Over time of course, the ties changed as succeeding generations adapted to their new homeland, but go to any ethnic area in the US and you will still see many maintaining these ties.

T.

[johnnym]

Just today I had an e-mail from a cousin who indicated that he had never known our common grandparents. Both were gone by the time I was a youngster. I replied with a couple pictures of the grandfather and grandmother that I had not known either, but I did have pictures. I can trace the families of all 4 of my grandparents to the 1700's with one branch (my paternal great-grandmother) back to 1370 in England. My personal family tree database has over 1,200 names and is growing - my son has a new niece born last week.

My Dad seldom spoke about family relationships unless he was cornered. My interest did not develop until I was grown and had kids of my own. He is gone now, but I was able to get quite a bit from him before he passed on.

[gilmore]

Some people just aren't interested in family history, and it does take a lot of work researching it of the kind that many find boring and tedious; however, it may happen that as your enthusiasm for genealogy grows, your father's interest may be piqued, perhaps by some aspect of his ancestry that he can relate to or identify with. Or perhaps not. I wouldn't worry about it.