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[auld argonian]

Here we go again....better check with the local hotels and motels to see if they have enough room for all of the kilties who are going to show up in your town to give you their support.

It was, I believe, H. L. Mencken who said, "There is no point in arguing with a person whose paycheck depends on not being convinced."

And that's what you're dealing with. I don't know how or why these administrators get the idea that the kilt is not appropriate but...

I would suggest that a parent might sit down with the guy and calmly explain the situation (if one of your parents is an attorney, that'd be swell) and if the principal continues to use the "slippery slope" argument, the parent should just tell him to cut the excuses and explain what his real reason is. They might be able to come to an agreement but don't count on it.

As has been mentioned earlier, you can cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war...I'm sure that you'll get some sympathy from any local Scottish Society and Lord knows that someone in the press will know a story when he or she sees it. (Bear in mind, though, that the press doesn't actually care if you are wrong or right here...all they care about is whether the story will be provocative and get people to read their newspaper or watch their TV news show.) Some time back we had a similar situation on the forum and, again, if I remember correctly, Xmarks and its allies managed to completely jam the principal in question's email box up for days....but when that happens, they just wait for the ruckus to die down, dump the system and figure that if it was important they'll send another email later.

You really don't know me at all but I will tell you that I am the absolute last person to tell anyone that they shouldn't "tilt at windmills". I would personally love to hear that you were able to get the fella to reverse himself and that you went to your prom lookin' like a million bucks in Scottish money. I do think, though, that while there is great value in learning to stick up for yourself, there is equal value in learning how to deal with things when they don't go your way. Certainly, you have to decide just how far you want to take things but should you not prevail, please be prepared to be graceful in defeat. If it don't go your way, take pride in the fact that you have made a good case and did your best. The concept of honor gets batted about here frequently and sometimes honor demands that you take the hit, suck it up and move on.

That having been said...not sure what your tartan is but if you're stuck wearing a tux, fer sure get the tartan bowtie and cumberbund. That would be a wee, small dig at the Powers That Be.

You will have many opportunities to wear the kilt in the future...high school's over so just take joy in that and don't let the bastards get you down.

Best

AA

ps: I also hope that this'll prompt you to observe both the Anniversary of the Proscription of Highland Dress (August 1, 1746) and the Repeal of the Proscription of Highland Dress Act (July 1, 1782). Wear your kilt in defiance on August 1 and wear your kilt in celebration on July 1.

[Kiltman]

By the way he has given as a reason a fallacy. It called the 'slippery slope' fallacy.I would have thought better of someone who educates.

[Nighthawk]

By the way he has given as a reason a fallacy. It called the 'slippery slope' fallacy.I would have thought better of someone who educates.

My parents are teachers. Never underestimate the ignorance of admin.

[dutchy kilted]

Keep pressing! You can point out to him that at one time a tuxedo was not considered "formal" but a young man at the Tuxedo Park Country Club in October 1886 modified the traditional (at that time) long tails for men into what we now think of as "standard" formal wear.

You are asking to wear formal wear that is much older and is considered formal wear by the British Monarchy. Is he saying that the prom is not a formal event? It sounds like he is pushing his own bias as school policy. Unfortunately, in a small school district that is often allowed. At least make him but his "reasoning" into writing, since you already did so.

I do like the idea of wearing a tartan cumberbund and tie as a compromise - I'm sure there are many clans that would be glad to accept you as one of their own if you don't already belong to one.

[Brian K]

You could always go to the school board. Not all of them are fronts for the administration. It's also a way of making a bit of a public fuss and following proper channels at the same time.By making a carefully reasoned appeal to the board you're also going to garner some media attention without having to make yourself look like a media whore who's doing it just for the attention.

The only remedy for ignorance is education and you've got some educating to do!

Good luck,

Brian

[Bludongle]

gawd.

this kind of silliness over a kilt when there are meatier issues like us gays just wanting go to prom together? or is he equating this to evil?

doesn't that principle have better targets to be ignorant over?

I agree with the aforementioned arguments from one on one to media involvement. take your steps. be polite. stand your ground. if not here then where?

glad you are man enough to question and man enough to use the proper channels to address your grievance. best of luck!

J
(ps: if you choose a writing campaign let us know.)

[csbdr]

Weeeelll...the other side of things here is with guys like this, pressing the issue often has the opposite effect. Rather than pusuaded, they are angered and defensive next about your confronting the issue further. They are not only mired in their ignorance, but afraid. Afraid of their staff, parents, upper admin, you name it. I don't know this guy but it sounds like you have already made well reasoned, thoughtful arguements and he has still come to a fairly ignorant conclusion and decision. I'm not saying don't give it a go, but it doesn't sound like this guy will ever have the open mindedness to give the green light.

[Nighthawk]

Weeeelll...the other side of things here is with guys like this, pressing the issue often has the opposite effect. Rather than pusuaded, they are angered and defensive next about your confronting the issue further. They are not only mired in their ignorance, but afraid. Afraid of their staff, parents, upper admin, you name it. I don't know this guy but it sounds like you have already made well reasoned, thoughtful arguements and he has still come to a fairly ignorant conclusion and decision. I'm not saying don't give it a go, but it doesn't sound like this guy will ever have the open mindedness to give the green light.

You are very correct. That's exactly why Isaac needs to go above the principals head. The school board, the press- public schools are just that- public. He's a public official, and as such, works for the parents and students. One thing that people lose sight of is the fact that high school kids have the same civil rights as the rest of us. Schools do not have the right to search your bags without just cause any more than cops have the right to search my car without just cause. They do not have the right to limit your expression of heritage while allowing others to express theirs. They only think they have that right, and it's because no one fights back. If Isaac goes to the school board and makes a public issue out the principals prejudice, that will go a long way towards making things right. You said "They are not only mired in their ignorance..." That's not correct. Ignorance is a lack of education. Isaac has already education the principal, so it's not ignorance. It's stupidity. Ignorance is human nature. You are ignorant. I am ignorant. There is no way to ever not be ignorant. I don't speak Chinese, for example; I therefore am ignorant of the Chinese language. The principal has been educated about the history of Highland formal wear, been shown pictures, has been presented with reasonable arguments, and replied with "Nuh uh. I don't wanna" as his counter argument. That fits into the realm of stupidity, pure and simple, which is all that prejudice is- pure stupidity, a refusal to learn.I stopped tolerating stupid people a long time ago- especially the ones who use their authority to abuse people.

[AFS1970]

The principal is clearly using what I like to call "I'm the Mommy, that's why" logic.

If you choose to further this fight above his head, check one thing out first. See if there is a level between him and the school board, like a superintendent. If so, go there first. You have been very responsible and done things the right way up until now, it would not do well to miss a step here and risk alienating a potential ally.

Also, understand that the wheels of government often turn slowly and this fight may not even be decided in time for your prom, so if you take this fight further, you may be fighting for the principal and your children's right to wear kilts to their proms more than your own. That in and of itself does not make the argument any more or less valid. Just be prepared.

Thinking back to my own prom, there was one student who wore much more formal wear than the rest of us, and he was a guy who was rarely seen out of t-shirt and jeans. He chose a coat with tails, a top hat and even had a cane. I was very noticeable, and yet at the same time, not disruptive at all. I remember him getting several compliments from the other guys at the prom.

As for the slippery slope, the principal and school district is probably already at least half way down that slope, because as so many have mentioned there are other cultures that are openly encouraged to wear cultural dress. If anything, it is this that has allowed your cultural dress to be an option.

While I am not a fan of compromise, I can see the value of the tartan tie and cummerbund. If it doesn't conflict to badly, may I also suggest a sash for your date? I think that would set the tone quite well.

[CDNSushi]

Hard to say what the right thing would be to do at this point... It's very individual. However I WILL say that this time of year the news affiliates froth at the mouth for "prom stories." From CNN on down to the local TV station, around prom time they love to cover stories about teens who have been banned from wearing this, that or the other from their prom.

The most recent ones I can think of are the girl in Georgia? Alabama? (I forgot) whose prom dress was too revealing, and she chose 3 days suspension from school and 17 other seniors chose "paddling" as a punishment...

Then there was the prom that was canceled to stop a lesbian couple from attending.

If this were called in to the media, they'd probably LOVE to have a story of their very own....

Just a thought.

Otherwise, how about a kilted entourage? Kilted limo driver, kilted bunch of "protesters" who, obviously would not be able to enter the event or be on school grounds, but would certainly make a big statement to teachers, attendees and passers-by.

Anyway, whatever you decide, thanks for keeping us updated with your situation and whatever happens, don't let this turn you off from dressing as you please elsewhere, on any other occasion. Your time in high school is almost over anyway.