How to talk her into it?

**KiltedBrewer** · 6th April 09, 08:23 AM

It sounds to me like her argument isn't really what's bothering her, but I don't know what her objection might be. If you think it will help to see a kilted groom, I'd be happy to send you some photos from my kilted wedding last May. Just let me know.

David

**Chrissss** · 6th April 09, 08:24 AM

A Happy Wife = A Happy Life

Although it's your wedding, too...this is truly the Brides Day. She has very likely fantasized different scenario's over the years of what HER wedding day should be like. I would not want to interfere with that.

Yes, show her the various levels of formal dress...PC, Doublet's, etc. But if it were me I wouldn't force it if she doesn't come around. This is HER day to shine. Giving her that is one of the best wedding gifts you can give her.

Chris...
(happily married for 22 years...)

**fluter** · 14th April 09, 02:17 PM

[edit] KtW: apologies, I thought that I was at the last page of the thread when I posted. Hope everything continues to go well. [/edit]

Originally Posted by ali8780

I think everyone already gave great advice, just remember it's your wedding too!

Originally Posted by Chrissss

Although it's your wedding, too...this is truly the Brides Day.

Cynical hat ON:

Don't let anyone fool you: this is the Bride's Mom's Day. That may be where the potential problem lies.

Cynical hat OFF.

Of course, she might be more agreeable if you'd get busy and plight that troth!

I'm not rushing you, mind... just sayin'.

Practice your version of Rex's speech (doffs non-cynical hat in a north-westerly direction), and hit her with it when she says "yes."

**thescot** · 6th April 09, 09:14 AM

Well, I suspect that her father, brothers, uncles, etc. wear trousers all the time, but they'll probably wear them at the wedding without cheapening them.

I would suggest, in a very sweet way, that she is totally in control of the ladies' attire, and you should do the same for the men's. It is your wedding as well, after all. And your own heritage is as important as everyone else's.

And good luck. It is my experience that dealing logically and reasonably in a situtation like this is useless. Logic and reason are not often prevailing attributes of women regarding their weddings.

My wife insists it's the bride's day, and no one else's. Needless to say, we disagree. I simply ask her how it's going to happen without the groom or the minister.

**Kilt TN** · 6th April 09, 09:42 AM

If you wear you kilt most of the time, tell her you want to look natural and at eas

**Computergeek** · 6th April 09, 09:51 AM

Guy's I have to disagree with most of you. Chrisss has it right. I am getting married this July and my fiance supports me wearing the kilt all the time. When it came to the wedding I let her make the call on it because ultimatly this is her day. My part is to show up and look pretty (and that will eb enough of a chore by itself) and stand where I am told. Kerr the Walker if she supports you the rest of the time it is a little thing to put on a tux to make her happy. Remember when it comes to weddings a groom is jsut an accessory to go with a brides smile.

**Kerr the Walker** · 6th April 09, 10:04 AM

Many thanks for the replies and suggestions. I think what it's going to come down to is me saying my piece to tell her how I feel about it, but if she won't get on board to drop it. All told, it's just clothes and not worth getting all bent about.

I'll definitely keep you all posted reagrdless.

**ronstew** · 6th April 09, 01:22 PM

Hands up every man who argued with his wife over the wedding and then had a successful marriage!

The two most important words in a husband's vocabulary: "Yes, dear."

Seriously:

1. Rex is a genius. Rex is smooth. Rex is a smooth genius.
2. Tell her that you want to look your best, but that she will inevitably look better.
3. Ask her to look ahead twenty years to looking back 19 years. Doesn't she want to remember you looking your best on her wedding day?

While I don't buy the "it's her day" argument, in the end, kilts are just clothes, as you say. If you defer to her in this (without negotiation), you may be displaying great character. If you defer to her in everything, I would not call that healthy.

**puffer** · 8th April 09, 01:34 PM

You might get her one of these. ( note my daughter who is a part time modle & fashion consultant ( she's in Grad. School ) is saving to buy one to wear for DRESS occasions.)

http://www.theweescottishshop.com/St...x?category=271

Puffer

**pastorsteve** · 8th April 09, 07:32 PM

Originally Posted by Kerr the Walker

Many thanks for the replies and suggestions. I think what it's going to come down to is me saying my piece to tell her how I feel about it, but if she won't get on board to drop it. All told, it's just clothes and not worth getting all bent about.

I'll definitely keep you all posted reagrdless.

You are very correct. Crying over not being able to wear a kilt to the wedding would be very juvenile. It is in fact simply clothing. If she knows you respect her wishes and desires, she may soften her stance. If not, you'll look great in a tux, or whatever.