Compliments at Church

[Mark Stephenson]

Joel -
I wore my kilt to Christmas Eve and Easter services last year. I was a little nervous as nobody had ever worn a kilt (to my knowledge) to our church (United Methodist). I wore a tweed jacket and waistcoat, so I was fairly dressed up. As these are "special" services, many men who normally would wear slacks and a collared shirt also wore a coat and tie. I can say I got MANY compliments. One elderly lady came up to me after Christmas Eve service. She was originally from Scotland. She actually got choked up as she thanked me for being kilted, and said she could not remember the last time she saw a man in a kilt. So, you may wish to consider making one of the special church services as the time to make your debut in a kilt. I also think you would feel more comfortable if you made your debut in a tweed jacket and tie.
It also helped me that I am of Scottish heritage and was wearing my family tartan. Many folks asked me what tartan I was wearing and it made me feel good to say, "Stephenson Modern".

[J_Mimbs]

Mark, that's a great idea. That might be the perfect time to try it.

Now I just need to get a nice kilt; I'm not sure my SWK Economy will cut it!

[thescot]

I made the same statement (ponytail) for about 8 years...and I AM the pastor! (But I understand your caution...I always worry about my three kids being in the congregational "fishbowl.")

Actually, lawyers, doctors and such live in a fishbowl. Everyone watches them and talks about them.

Pastors live in a birdcage. Everyone watches them and talks about them, but they also poke at them through the bars. And you really can't poke back. ith:

[FatherWilliam57]

Actually, lawyers, doctors and such live in a fishbowl. Everyone watches them and talks about them.

Pastors live in a birdcage. Everyone watches them and talks about them, but they also poke at them through the bars. And you really can't poke back. ith:

Excellent point! (I bow humbly in the presence of greatness and wisdom.)

[biblemonkey]

Actually, lawyers, doctors and such live in a fishbowl. Everyone watches them and talks about them.

Pastors live in a birdcage. Everyone watches them and talks about them, but they also poke at them through the bars. And you really can't poke back. ith:

I love it!

And per the rest of the thread, I've never understood the basis for most of the dressing conventions for church other than it is a cultural tradition. Even after years of Bible study to figure out other's issues with my beard and pony tail I don't get it. It's so nice to know that there are many more congregations that, while following their Biblical teaching, don't get all caught up in the the "traditions made by men" and just love folks.

Just to make it easier on the more conservative folks, the first time I wore my kilt during morning service, I wore my waistcoat and argyle jacket with a tie. Even the pastor (who doesn't like kilts) said he was wrong and I looked very nice. That being my experience I'd say to go for that kind of thing as your first kilted-at-church moment, J_Mimbs. Ease them into it.

[Father Bill]

Good grief, lad - anybody's welcome in my churches in anything except that which is blatantly disrespectful of religion or people. Pony tails? Sure! Long hair? Sure!

By the way... who said Jesus had long hair? Although a lot of folks in that day and place did, I'm not aware of any contemporary photos to corroborate the fact.

[Tobus]

And per the rest of the thread, I've never understood the basis for most of the dressing conventions for church other than it is a cultural tradition. Even after years of Bible study to figure out other's issues with my beard and pony tail I don't get it. It's so nice to know that there are many more congregations that, while following their Biblical teaching, don't get all caught up in the the "traditions made by men" and just love folks.

While it may be "traditions made by men", and largely irrelevant to actual worship, one cannot necessarily discount the issue of respect and decorum. Church is very much indeed a social gathering, and one cannot escape social conventions without inadvertently causing offense or feelings of disrespect.

Of course, every congregation will be different, and there are no hard-and-fast rules that apply everywhere.

But in the end, church is not necessarily the place to make fashion statements or social statements. That would be contrary to the purpose of it. Church is for meeting with fellow parishioners for the purpose of worshipping. Given that worship, by definition, entails respect and humility, it makes perfect sense that man-made traditions for proper church dress would revolve around garments that are respectful and humble.

I certainly don't mean to preach at you about it (pun intended), but that's just the traditional way I was raised (being the son of a Methodist preacher). I was taught that worship services are not the place to make it about "me", but about the actual worship. After-church activities like luncheons, group activities, etc., are more suited to wearing clothing in the more casual category, with plenty of room for personal flair.

Obviously none of this should have anything to do with whether the folks at church love one another, etc. But the older I get, the more I see the value in the art of decorum that is appropriate to the event. For worship, it all revolves around respect and humility. A beard and ponytail are part of who you are, and I would agree that these things shouldn't be changed (although they should be clean, combed, and otherwise well-groomed for church). But exterior things like clothing, which are daily choices on how one presents oneself to others, should be chosen with appropriateness in mind.

Is it a man-made tradition? Well, of course. But a good many church traditions are. And again, each church (as well as each congregation) will have its own traditions and levels of tolerance for bucking tradition. You just have to play it by ear in your own situation. But if you feel like you're pushing the edge of tradition, then chances are everyone else thinks so too. And I would almost guarantee you that whether they say something or not, they will at least be thinking in their minds that it's a tad disrespectful.

I hope my comments are taken in the spirit they were given; not trying to be judgmental or anything. Just responding to the point you brought up.

[piperdbh]

And per the rest of the thread, I've never understood the basis for most of the dressing conventions for church other than it is a cultural tradition.

A missionary in Haiti, whom I am privileged to know, says that when she goes to church, she is entering the throneroom of the King, and cosequently wears her best clothes.

Even after years of Bible study to figure out other's issues with my beard and pony tail I don't get it.

Long hair and beards have stereotypically been associated with "outlaws" and are sometimes seen as a holdover from "the world", which we are supposed to leave behind.

Kilt on, laddie!

[J_Mimbs]

A missionary in Haiti, whom I am privileged to know, says that when she goes to church, she is entering the throneroom of the King, and cosequently wears her best clothes.

I echo that sentiment, but I've seen it taken to an extreme that alienates others because they don't "measure up". I know some Christians who would be horrified at a kilt being worn in church no matter how its dressed up, and some who would show up in a bathing suit if they could; you get all stripes. I think most of them miss the point though; its not a religion of appearance after all. The idea of making myself presentable to enter God's presence is a personal issue and not one I try to impose on others.

But back to the topic at hand, I'm trying to lose a bit of weight, but once I do I'll be ordering a proper wool tank in Lamont Modern which should look very presentable in church.

[biblemonkey]

But back to the topic at hand, I'm trying to lose a bit of weight, but once I do I'll be ordering a proper wool tank in Lamont Modern which should look very presentable in church.

I started a fitness goal thread a while back. Just type "Fitness Challenge" in the search field. Lots of good folks there all trying to get healthier, thinner, stronger, whatever your goals are. While I admit that I have been a little lax in my own diligence and dedication to fitness recently I am preparing to amp it up again and I'm sure hearing about your progress would be an encouragement to everyone involved in the thread.