Are we eccentrics?

[Graham]

Thanks Bill, hey, hang in there mate, when your wife sees you sincerity and committment she will slowly change.
My wife is not demanding I wear a kilt, but her comfort with it is steadily growing. It all takes time.

[bubba]

When I started wearing kilts I thought my wife might have reservations about it. Instead she thought it was great and she really likes the look. Something we both get a chuckle out of is when we go shopping and she's wearing jeans and I'm in a kilt. It does get some puzzled looks. I just tell people that now they can actually see who really wears the pants in the family

[Hamish]

[quote="al'........................................ ....................................
Like you, I will be more myself when I retire. When that day comes, I won't give a damn.

BTW I can't imagine you ever not being 'likeable'. Were you ever that awful?

Al[/quote]

My problem (although I had no idea I actually HAD a problem) was that, prior to my taking early retirement, I had no notion that I was not 'myself'. I believed that conforming to what everyone around me wanted or expected of me was 'me'! How sad is that?

As to your question Al.: Yes, I think I was (although the recent choice of the word "likeable" was not mine!).

[Xcop]

Al,

I can certainly relate. I was there for a very long time. I could only wear my kilt during Highland Games Week, and even then they didn't understand. Being free of that life will set you free..but enjoy it while there, and live just at the edge. If their minds are so closed as not to accept them, you don't need their friendship, only their backup.
David

[al' Sporrano]

[quote="I believed that conforming to what everyone around me wanted or expected of me was 'me'! How sad is that?

[/quote]

Hi Ham.

I think this is a very common situation a lot of folk find themselves in. My social psychology lecturer spent a lot of time talking about the 'self'. 'Self fulfilling prophecies' and the 'looking glass self' and all that.

You try and conform to what others expect of you in order to be accepted. Or alternatively, you end up believing what people say about you and start behaving accordingly.

You end up with a personality which is controlled by the environment you live and work in......unless of course you are extremely confident; then you start making waves and alienating people.

It can be very hard being an individual.

Complicated life is....yes?

Al

[al' Sporrano]

Al,

I can certainly relate. I was there for a very long time. I could only wear my kilt during Highland Games Week, and even then they didn't understand. Being free of that life will set you free..but enjoy it while there, and live just at the edge. If their minds are so closed as not to accept them, you don't need their friendship, only their backup.
David

Don't get me wrong, David. I really love my job and for the most part get on with most of my colleagues. I stay clear of the ones I don't.

Only twice have I had 'problems', both women. Ironically, neither of them are in the job anymore. Both left under a cloud which reassured me the problem was theirs and not mine.

I used to get a lot of stick from colleagues about my singing and acting exploits. It was considered 'alien' to the culture of the force at the time. Things have changed in that I can now sue the socks off anyone who makes derogatory comments about my hobby - and I'd win!! Diversity is the in thing at the moment.

Apart from that, some have seen and heard me perform and have been suitably impressed. Word has got round that 'he's actually very good' and the attitude has changed somewhat. Some also know I wear a kilt. No one has dared say anything negative, to my face at any rate.

Alan

[RockyR]

I think it's interesting to see the different levels of "comfort" people here have in wearing the kilt. Some of us have wives and friends that will not support us (they think it's weird). Some of us don't want to wear it to our job or out to the mall and just stick to wearing it in the house and during Celtic Festivals. Others wear it daily to paint signs and at their jobs.

I went through all of these levels myself. When I first wore my kilt, it was to the Gym to win a bet. Bet was won and I liked wearing it. Some of my friends would ask me (before a night of drinking and debauchery) if I was going to wear my kilt. They didn't like the attention and reactions (although they never complained about the girls we got because of it). I didn't wear it out to my job (Snowboard store manager) b/c it might not "jive" with the snowboard image. When I DID start wearing it to the store, I got MANY positive reactions.

Now I wear one 4 or 5 days a week. I can HONESTLY say that I don't care what others think. As others of you have posted, when I get looks now, I wonder what they are looking at and then remember that I'm in a kilt. Locals no longer stare b/c they are used to me and my kilted ways.

Not only is the kilt ITSELF a liberating garment, but the "I don't care what you think of me" burdon being lifted off of my shoulders is like the weight of the world lifting. Knowing that I am who I am and that I make no excuses or appologies for it is a FANTASTIC feeling. If people think you're weird and won't accept you for wearing a kilt and expressing who you are, then you don't need them as a friend anyway! It's an easy way to weed out the "acquaintences" and have true friends.

I hope you ALL get to experience the level of freedom of garment and mind that I describe here.

[Graham]

I hope so too Rocky, and thanks for your insight, what you describe does take time altho' I am happy to say that that time has been relatively short for me, but I guess as you said, we're all in differing positions and at differing stages.

I'm glad we have this forum to learn from each other.

BTW I learned that you have heard from a good friend of mine locally, I'm glad to hear it, he is the only other guy in our area who has a full time committment to kilting.

[Rhino]

Al wrote

I remember being told as much by my training Sergeant 17yrs ago.

Nice to hear from you Al I was wondering where you'd got to.
One of my managers once said to me 'you're an enigma wrapped up in a paradox', but he was a psychologist so I ignored him
As for stages of kilt wearing, I wore mine when and where I liked immediately, mainly because I didn't know anyone might or would have a problem with them. Thats not to say I wasn't nervous sometimes, but it's the fear/excitement of wearing kilts that is also the fun bit. Like a lucky dip you never know whats going to happen, could be good could be bad, but it WON'T be boring.
Never did understand what the psychologist was blathering about
Cheers Rhino

[Rufus]

Never did understand what the psychologist was blathering about
Cheers Rhino

Don't worry Rhino, they usually don't either.