Dumb mistakes you've made as a piper

[Jack Daw]

When I first started to play in front of others I had to march with my instructor and play Scotland the Brave and Amazing Grace. My instructor told me where we were to march because I was marching next to him and not to his rear. Anyway, he changed his mind and direction and it flummoxed me so much that when we ended on the last note of Amazing Grace, I forgot to drain the air from my bag. While he ended crisply, my bag died a noisy death. VERY embarrassing!

[kiltedsawyer]

I'm not a piper, but have a good friend who is one. He brought his pipes to our Christmas party last year at my request. When the time came for him to play, he couldn't get so much as a squeak. He took them apart and a BIC pen slid out of his chanter. He was a little embarrassed, but still played very well and was appreciated by all in attendance.

David

[OC Richard]

I've been doing gigs for over 30 years and quite a few mishaps have taken place. Each becomes a lesson in how to be better prepared the next time.

I'm fanatical about pipe maintance and often check the hemping of the various joints. This is because I've seen chanters pop out (mine hasn't thank goodness) and at one gig my bass would slip as I was playing in spite of being checked and rehemped the day before.

I often check the tightness of the bag. Just last week I found that one stock was working loose in its tie-in. I play a standard leather L&M bag because of their amazing reliablity. I've seen a number of piper's sythetic bags have seams or grommets blow wide open at gigs and competitions.
To be extra sure, I not only have my stocks tied in in the traditional way but also have hoseclamps on them. I am NOT going to have a stock blow out at a gig!

I have little harnesses of hemp tied around each drone reed so that the reeds cannot fall out of the reed seats. Still, right before I am to play at a gig, I do a little suck on the end of each drone (yes it looks silly) to make sure that each drone has its reed in place.
At one gig just as the minister was saying "It is my great honour to present for the first time Mr and Mrs So-and-so" I discovered that indeed one reed had fallen. I just had time to shove some tissue in the drone and play on cue. Now I keep little foam earplugs in my sporran and jacket pocket for such times.

I've seen pipers' drone cords pop apart at gigs or competitions so now I carry little zip-ties in my pipe case.

I no longer use electrical tape on my chanter because at one wedding the tape on my High G slipped down despite the fact that I had taken off all the old tape, cleaned my chanter, and put on all new tape the week before.
Unfortunately the tune I was playing for the Bride, Planxty Fanny Power, has a load of High G's in it. I didn't have the presence of mind to think up a tune that didn't have any High G's in it.
So that day I took off all the electrical tape and switched to Gaffer's tape which does not get gooey or slide about.

At gigs I have the outside tenor stopped so that I can tune the drones very quickly in cases where the chanter unexpectedly changes in pitch. Why the outside tenor? Because it's less obvious visually, less of a reach, to tune the bass and middle tenor on the fly. By the way, having to tune on the fly is one of the reasons pipers doing gigs should be able to tune their drones quickly with the pipes all going rather than having to stop off drones and tune them one at a time. You just don't have that luxury at gigs: you have to play on cue.

Despite all the preparation and hard lessons learned the pipes have a way of doing the unexpected: just last week I was playing at a wedding and my chanter's scale began to go off in a way it never has done before. It's a very good reliable reed, but the Low A, B, C, and F kept getting flatter and flatter the longer I played though the Low G, D, E, High G, and High A all stayed on pitch. I was playing on damp grass which I think was to blame. Anyhow I kept having to move tape off those flat notes. Then, at the end of the wedding, I had to march everyone across a large paved area and lo and behold all those flat notes began rising and rising!!

[chasem]

I want to read more of these... Mainly because I hope to be on the pipes in the next 4-5 months, and I want to know what to be prepared for...

And also because I'm sure I'll have stories to add at that point...

[cajuncelt]

I want to read more of these... Mainly because I hope to be on the pipes in the next 4-5 months, and I want to know what to be prepared for...

And also because I'm sure I'll have stories to add at that point...

Here's a few I've "heard" (wink) of:

If you play an event where you strike up & start inside, watch your bass drone hitting the door while piping to the outside.

If you go into "When the Battles O'er" when the rest of the band for some weird reason plays "The Rowen Tree", jump into the correct tune & glare at the guy next to you while shaking your head.

While marching with drones under arm, ensure drone tops have not slipped off the tuning pins or you might get smacked in the face by it when bringing up to strike in.

When on the playing field, if you take a left when the rest of the band, again for some strange reason, takes a right...keep marching to the parking lot and tell your friends later you were playing a solo cause you're that good.

If you overblow and all drones cut out, play to the end of the part while adding trills or other cool sound effects, quickly re-strike in and act like you were imitating Gordan Walker playing a solo or something.

If you're playing "Wings", don't go into "Scotland the Brave".

Don't think about above statement or you'll end up doing it.

On second thought, I'm gonna write a book.

[SteveB]

If your bass drone is within six inches of the door jamb/archway when you pass through, it WILL cut out, and really make the high hand work you are doing sound horrible.

[Squeaky McMurdo]

Well, when taking piping lessons, my husband and I took our baby daughter with us. At this point she was about 4 months old.

Well, while the teacher was working with the other students, I let my daughter play with my practice chanter (a poly penco one that a 4 month old can't hurt, especially not within a matter of less than two minutes....right?)). So it comes my turn and I reclaim my chanter and go to start playing "I See Mull". My chanter makes this sound "Phtttttttth SQUEEEphttttth!" I figure the reed had come loose so I open it up....and out comes a LARGE quantity of foamy baby drool, the whole mouthpiece was filled.

Everyone Eeeews and has a good laugh while I clean it out and go to play again. "Phtttttth!" Drool then starts leaking out of ALL the holes. Yup, my entire chanter was clear full of baby drool and I didn't have anything to remove it with quickly so while everyone else was practicing, I was sitting with my chanter dripping drool out onto a spare baby blanket.



--Chelsea McMurdo--

[HarborSpringsPiper]

Oh, the joys of motherhood . . .

I have a set of Walsh shuttlepipes. My oldest daughter was probably 8 or 9 years old at the time. I have absolutely no idea what she did but in a matter or seconds, she totally turned the chanter reed sour without removing the chanter from the stock. Ahh, I destroyed a bunch of my parents' stuff when I was a kid too.

[Mac Ghille Sheathanaich]

Greetings all, 28 November, 751amMST

The worst thing I've ever done is go to a gig with a reed that isn't entirely broken in yet.

Fide et Fortitudine, aye,

T.

[Jaggy thistle]

When I was young we stayed on a farm at Hogmanay my friend who was a piper came to pipe in the new year as it was raining it was suggested that he played in the byre he marched up and down playing fine with every cow in the byre lifting its tail and letting go!! had 2 extra barrowfulls the next morning !!