Should you feel insulted?

[J.B. Simpson]

To each his own but I would never use that response,and I have noticed several members say that.
You may be opening yourself up to something that might turn ugly real quick.
Why throw fuel on a fire thats not yet lit.

I agree. With the mentality of an increasing number of people today being witty may end you up with a visit to the E.R. or worse! My Grandfather imparted a couple of tidbits of very useful information to me when I was younger, and I follow them to this day.

#1- No matter how tough tough you think you are there is always somebody tougher.

#2- (If it comes down to not being able to avoid a fight, there is no such thing as a good clean fight.) There are no rules in fighting you are fighting to win, not lose.

[Racer96]

Wow, Thanks for remembering me, Ted. That was nice.

Woah... Thanks for passing that along, Ted! I have to say: I don't think I could pull off the long kilt look, but Racer96 certainly can! Being that he's japanese, it really does give a hakama-like effect that's quite interesting.

Thanks Ryan. Really, I've come to find that it's all a matter of confidence. I feel like I look GOOD when I'm wearing a kilt. No matter it's length, material, color, or tartan. Because of that, I think that people don't usually try to insult me. (At least, not anymore than they would if I wasn't wearing a kilt , as they say, some people are idiots, and nothing can stop them )

Mike

[Ryan Ross]

Thanks Ryan. Really, I've come to find that it's all a matter of confidence. I feel like I look GOOD when I'm wearing a kilt. No matter it's length, material, color, or tartan. Because of that, I think that people don't usually try to insult me. (At least, not anymore than they would if I wasn't wearing a kilt , as they say, some people are idiots, and nothing can stop them )

Mike

Aye, that's the key. If you walk around like the world's your oyster, I find that other people start to think that the world is your oyster, aswell!

As a side note, I've seen an antique hakama that was made of fabric with a tartan-like design (it looked a bit like Royal Stuart, as I recall). I'm wondering if you've come across this before?

Personally, I found it pretty cool... wish I had a pair.

[Nick the DSM]

i think if we felt insulted we would be missing out on a lot of things.

1. you chose to wear the kilt, you know what can happen.
2. if you bought, then you should wear it with pride- no matter what!
3. be cool with it

[elitekiltedcommando]

Literally adding fuel to the fire - fun.

Metaphorically doing so - not the best of ideas.

[Barry]

I always treat all comments as a compliment and thank them for noticing. As mentioned before, this deflates an intended insult and makes the insulter look foolish.

At an assertiveness course I once went on this technique was mentioned, and it is known as "snowing". Basically, insults don't work if you don't allow yourself to be insulted. Even when the insulter tries to ramp up the insult to get a reaction just stay cool and ride the wave. Most often these bozos get fed up or frustrated and move on to an easier target.

BTW I don't ever get offended by my kilts getting called skirts. To loosely paraphrase Shakespeare: What's in a name? - a kilt by any other name would still look great!

[RobertParker]

When I worked with foster children, most of whom had behavioral problems, I often told them that it takes two people to have a fight (and there were LOTS of fights ).

The same thing goes here. Someone can say something intended to be insulting, but I believe I have a choice about whether or not to feel insulted (of course, some things are more likely to push my buttons than others - call it a higher predisposition to being insulted by some topics). But nonetheless . . . I don't have to feel insulted unless I decide that person has enough influence to do so. Semantics, perhaps . . . but that's how I see it.

[Riverkilt]

So often this comment is meant in a very positive way.

Usually, the comment is made by someone interrupting their day to give it. "Thank You" works well and I keep on truckin' with what I'm up to.

If the comment is made by someone fishing for the correct term, or by someone I'm gonna be around for a while (new coworker, etc.) it doesn't hurt to take a moment and say, "Thank you, this type of skirt is called a kilt."

If its some fool knocking the chip off my shoulder for his own entertainment then I have a whole lot of fast decisions to make. If I'm STUPID enough to engage the fool...STUPID enought to match my wit with someone who won't "get it" anyway because he's a fool...well...its me that's made the decision to waste my time trying to teach the pig to sing.

I have found that the longer I wear kilts the less "hassle" I get. Believe it is due to how I carry myself when kilted and because the folks around town have gotten used to seeing me kilted. When I'm traveling it all falls back on how I carry myself.

God knows I'm way too olde to fight over it. Visions of trying to explain to police that the fight started when he called my kilt a skirt....

Also have had success with giving the insulter a very confused look and saying, "Huh?? I don't get it."

Or, "Thank you, I got tired of dressing like a woman, pants are so restrictive."

Somewhere there's a book lurking...along the lines of Thompson's So You're Going to Wear the Kilt...only with the things strangers are going to say to you and suggestions for responses based on the stranger's attitude.

Ron

[Galb]

To each his own but I would never use that response,and I have noticed several members say that.
You may be opening yourself up to something that might turn ugly real quick.
Why throw fuel on a fire thats not yet lit.

Well, I would say it in jest. Answer a smart-*** remark with one in my opinion. ;) Basically, for shits and giggles. It wouldn't be meant to start anything, however, I can see how something could escalate. But in that case it would appear that the original smart *** would've been looking for a fight to begin with. Most people would laugh at the response. ;)

I agree. With the mentality of an increasing number of people today being witty may end you up with a visit to the E.R. or worse! My Grandfather imparted a couple of tidbits of very useful information to me when I was younger, and I follow them to this day.

#1- No matter how tough tough you think you are there is always somebody tougher.

#2- (If it comes down to not being able to avoid a fight, there is no such thing as a good clean fight.) There are no rules in fighting you are fighting to win, not lose.

#1, absolutely true.

#2 also true, however, a simple knock down and drag em out fight usually ends when the first bloke hits the ground. That being said, people can get carried away easily.

In the end, I would always respond in jest. The jammie response is a good one, as is a simple "thank you". I just have a tendency to be a little more sarcastic. To each their own.

[Clockwork John]

I agree. With the mentality of an increasing number of people today being witty may end you up with a visit to the E.R. or worse! My Grandfather imparted a couple of tidbits of very useful information to me when I was younger, and I follow them to this day.

#1- No matter how tough tough you think you are there is always somebody tougher.

#2- (If it comes down to not being able to avoid a fight, there is no such thing as a good clean fight.) There are no rules in fighting you are fighting to win, not lose.

#2 also true, however, a simple knock down and drag em out fight usually ends when the first bloke hits the ground. That being said, people can get carried away easily.

My thoughts regarding #2... No one fights honorably anymore. There was a time, not to long ago, when it was enough just to fight... win our lose, you had your honor...
I've seen way too many fights at high schools, and at punk shows, where the combatants fight to destroy... they stop just shy of fighting to kill.
Far too often, the loser in a fight comes back with friends, or a weapon, or friends with weapons...

There's being witty, and then there's being a prick and trying to pass it off as being witty...

Don't try to make jerks or morons look stupid. Don't try to put them in their place... You're only inviting problems, and if you can't avoid physical violence, you've already lost the fight.

As my grandfather used to say... If you can't say anything nice then shut the hell up and go home.