I play bass guitar and on Sunday night I was depping for the regular bass player at an open mic in a nearby pub. As it was the last one before Hogmanay I decided to do the gig in my Royal Stewart. The usual questions ensued of course, and one particulary mad crazy woman who is a regular in there was trying to lift it up as I was playing and even tried crawling along the floor at one point to get a look underneath! Anyway I suspected something like that would happen so I went prepared- I took an old pair of Union Jack boxers with me (clean, of course!) and kept them in my coat pocket. At the end of the gig I took them with me to the bathroom and tucked them inside the waistband of the kilt. I then went up to this woman and before she could say anything I said "I've got a present for you sweetheart" and pulled them out from under the kilt and threw them at her, her friends were going crazy! All good fun.