Oh the fun of having a white tie highland athletic competition!


Just imagine the pep talk Coach Panache would give!


"Gentlemen, remember to be extremely careful and not soil your white gloves on the Braemar stone. It is most helpful to have a small brush concealed about your person and remove any dirt or mud that the stone acquires with a few brisk strokes before taking hold of it.

Also I want to see each and everyone of you properly address the caber before starting your lift. A simple "How do you do" should be sufficient.

As usual there will be no perspiring allowed on the field. Should one find one's face with a slight glow, please be discreet in removing it with your pocket squares.

And please refrain from any sort of undignified noises when exerting yourselves on the field. Should you absolutely feel the need to make some sort of an exclamation on your release let's keep it to a reasonably volumed "Tally ho!"

Right then! Off you go and may the best competitor proved themselves worthy!"